Red Hot Passion
31 December 2005

One whole big chunk of mush. Loves!

Hello world! Presently at Sophia's now. Yes yes fine. So I've been going to people's hse and sneaking time to blog! Hah. Anyways, Delphinus is having a jolly good time watching The Pacifier up at Sophia's erm, second floor bed/floor thing? I've no idea what it really is exactly.

Anyways, I've been doing a great deal of pondering lately and let's just say that things are really not what they seem to be. Hurh. It's okay if you don't get it. Cos seriously, this post is really a "for me" thing. Selfish I know. Oh well. Some things are just not meant to be shared right down to the last detail. (:

I really cant stand it when people do that. I really cant. It's like yeah okay. But you dont have to make it seem as though you didnt mean it to be meant that way. Just say what you mean dammit! Annoying crap.


So the new year's approaching. In a few hours time. What have I to say? Plenty really. So persevere on guys!

This year has been one with a good dose of "adversities" (note that I mentioned this first and foremost). One that's chockful of lessons. Some learnt, some yet to be drilled in this, I should say, rather stubborn someone. (:

It's basically just full of lessons, really. And a ton of experiences. Some I'd treasure for life, others I'd really just rather eradicate it out of my memory completely, thank you very much.

As a person, I've changed somewhat. For better, for worse? It's erm. Debatable? (: I've grown, most definitely. But some things can definitely still be improved. I mean come on. The day someone has nothing to improve at all, would be the day doom's here. Okay. That comparison doesnt sound quite right, yeah?

Sometimes, you look back, and you definitely think "WHY THE FUCK DID I DO THAT?!". Or the opposite. So very typical, but well, you'll never cease to learn. That's the most significant thing in 2005 for me. Learning. It's like the very start of my journey to really start learning about life and sorts. The beginning..... *cue for dramatic music* A new movie is born! A movie about me!! Okay sorry. Feeling pretty out of sorts now.

Hmm. What else? Oh right. Resolutions. New year resolutions. We all know we dont really keep to it right. So resolutions should be stuff that you dont want to fulfill? Man, I dont know.

I'll keep mine simple and personal. So none will be posted here. Oh maybe one. I'll try to keep my resolutions. Okay, maybe two? Study hard, of cos. Like duh. O levels. Wow. Cant believe I'm actually gonna be in Sec 4. It's kindda too soon for me. It's like. Four years will fly right by. Just like that.

About that. The end of these four years. I cant wait, really. Very exhilarating. The best has yet to come! I love new! The word itself! In many different ways.

New friends, new clothes, new school, new experiences, new lessons, new mistakes, new discoveries about myself, new discoveries about others, new opinions, new mentors, new memories, new this new that, new everything!

Which reminds me. I bought my new school shoes (I've got the solution as to how I'm gonna keep it as CLEAN as posssible) and a new school bag! Brand conscious lah, I'm sorry, shoot me will ya. (: Got all that from Parkway, after blading/picnic-king. (It looks like PANICKING, you know!)

So about the earlier part of the day.... Had breakfast at the Kopitiam opposite my house. Then cabbed to East Coast with my mum and brother. Stopped by Shop and Save to get tidbits. Then when the idiots are finally done with their breakfast, we bladed/cycled + my brother.

Rach, Sophia, Hilda, my bro and I bladed while Dina and Xiuqi cycled. It was loads of fun and madness too! Haha. I love Delphinus lah. Period. :D Love love! Plenty plenty!


Oh and sorry guys! The O.E people, I mean. For always being busy and not being able to hang out with you freaks after the great Commonwealth Chicken Rice! Haha. Will still meet up even when school reopens okay! Good! (Self-confirmed. Yeah man!)

Okay. Currently plugging in to Fiona's Ipod blasting BACKSTREET BOYS!!! AHH!! Omg. Soon, it'll be just 24 days to their concert! Woohoo!! I. Cannot. Wait. :D

Anyway, I'm just gonna cram everything and anything in this entry okay? Sorry lah. Withdrawal symptoms suck. So now I'm uh. Blogbingeing? But no, I'm not gonna puke it all out. Okay. Actually I am. Puking it all out. (:

Forgive me for being so all over the place. One minute I'm reminiscing, the next I'm describing shit, the next I'm apologising, and the next I'm crapping. Nyeh. Sucks lah. Being here in the room with 11 other people, half belching out to Energy, the other half making so much noise just for the sake of it, and here I am, The Anti-social blocked out from all by BSB....can be confusing and it does things to the ordinary human brain. Not that mine is all that ordinary lah, but that's not the point. Heh. And not that it sucks. It rocks, really. I lied. HAHA.

Now I'm the only one with a ponytail in the squad! Yay. That makes me special and unique. And no, I'm not gonna succumb to peer pressure and make the biggest mistake of my life! *Exaggerating but shut up lah*

Hilda and I are screaming out I Want It That Way!! HAHA. Competing with Ke and Co. (:

Anyway, I think it's best if I end it now, before it turns into one whole mess of junk. Oh right. It already has. Love ya guys! Have a merry new year and yeah. Here's to a 2006! Cheers!

Ciao babes!

9:16 PM


27 December 2005

That infamous cheating dillema

Hey all! Heck, do I miss blogging! As I think you have probably guessed, my computer is currently in crap condition. God knows what happened.

Anyway, let's just say the break was pretty cool. An odd sense of being free? Not touching the computer, at all, mind you, had this strange feeling of breaking free. Hah. I know. Weird. But well, like I've said before, people have their own special quirks. Quirks are cool.

I'm over at Aniszah's now. Staying the night. And tomorrow, at the break of dawn, I've to ciao. Cos she has netball, and it'd just be too weird being in her house without her.

Since I last blogged, a lot has happened, I suppose. A lot a lot! Not exactly, the very eventful, like I went out every day or what sort. But the kind that if my computer had not abandoned me and left me stranded, I'd have blogged about it sort.

Hmm, stuff like on Christmas Eve, I went over to Kakak Idayu's and had a great chat with her, Kak An, and their husbands! Hah. But mostly girl talk and advice on..... life? Yup. It was real fun. Issac's sense of humour, is really priceless! Abg Razif's is more of the super dry-lame sort. It was fun. (Reiterating but you know what. I miss typing. So shush you!)

What else? Over the past week or so, I've been talking to my mum loads. About everything under the sun. And I guess, the talks, couldnt be better. Usually, it'd be in the morning, while having the standard toast (with my dad's very own homemade apple jam!) and a cup of coffee. By then, my dad's off to work, and my brother's still asleep. So the two of us would be in th kitchen, with Kieffy eating her breakfast too!

I love the talks with my mum. It's just really enlightening and it gives me that sudden surge of warmth that I suppose only a mother can give. (=

Enough mushy crap, yeah?

Heard the song Goodbye my lover by James Blunt? The one Mischa Barton starred in the video? After watching that video, plus finally finishing reading the book Mariam lent me, I started thinking a bit further into it. The topic of infidelity, cheating, affairs, etc.

What could be the cause? Let's briefly scan through. Bored, not getting the kind of sex you want, the "magic" is lost, things have been too mundane for your liking. Which leads back to being bored and the magic being lost.

It's because you forgot the way things used to be? You cant be that way anymore, for some warped reason? You can't share those dreams anymore? You cant feel that "one" feeling with that other person anymore? Things like commitment, family, work tied you down? You fucking want some fun? You're not pleased like the way you used to be?

Fuck you.

They are merely excuses, hello?! There's not one single REASON for you to cheat. Okay, so you cant share like you used to, the feelings are worn and old and oh what a bore *sarcasm here*. SO? Put some effort! Effort = work. You've played your part at the very least. Whether things can still be salvaged or not, well heck, that's up to fate AFTER you've done your share of effort.

But you know what. I guess to some people, it just isnt worth the effort huh? How could you bloody do that to someone!? Anyone!

Nope, this rage was not accumulated from anything of real life experience, or whatever. It's just that it really pisses me off!

"Oh, I'm not getting what I need so I find it from somewhere else"?! Go ponder. I'm quite confused too. I mean, I suppose sometimes, when you cant even share your dreams and stuff, it really has gone all wrong somewhere somehow. Oh well. I'm just 15 and just questioning.

Here's the lyrics. I suppose, if you look at it from the cheater's point of view, it could make some sense? A little at least. But what about the cheatee's point of view? Well, it's still WRONG. Despite it all. But perhaps different situations call for different... rights and wrongs? Aw man, I don't know!

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.

So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.

You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.

I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.

I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.

We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you,
I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I'm so hollow, baby,
I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so,
I'm so hollow.

6:49 PM


11 December 2005

It's half full, not half empty

I am in a much better mood already. And yeah, I guess I do sound scary in the previous entry. Anyway, went for my aunt's kenduri cos she's going to haj for a month or so. It was really loads of fun cos I met my cousins! Man. We talked and talked and let's just say somehow, in about half a day, I've managed to be closer to them, simply by whatever we've shared. Amazing huh. What talking sense can actually do!

Emi is actually really intellectual, beneath all that craziness! Haha. An eccentric- misunderstood, he is! :D Salwa told me lots of stuff that quite frankly, shocked me half to death. But I'm flattered she found me worthy enough to be told so. And Cik Zin is really such a joker. He performed magic tricks!

Oh, and I was bullied the entire day by several people! Argh! The pain! (: But it was all for fun and hey, it's not everyday you get to spend with your cousins/aunts/uncles.

Today is actually a pretty good day! What a contrast! It's like the first half sucked so bad and the next half went really really well! Hmm. Maybe being happy for 50% of the day is not too bad after all! 100% would be asking for too much, right.

And did you know that John Lennon's killer and Green Day were really inspired by the book Catcher in the Rye?

Maybe I should really take Emi's suggestion seriously. Read Catcher in the Rye than read The Alchemist! The contrast, is way too cool. Gotta try it.

Okay then. A boring one, it is. Ciao babes!

11:23 PM


OTT rant session. Accept it, not tolerate...?

Oh. My. God. *punches the nearest soul which in this case is the computer cos really, I have a feeling that it is sort of alive in some whacked way*

I feel like storming downstairs and strangling a whole bunch of Mats cos duh they're obviously a nuisance to the society. Plus the Minahs and the Bengs and the Lians and a certain group of inconsiderate fans.

I also feel like shopping for new clothes to ease my mind off all things in relation to unhappy unhealthy feelings. Although I know some of you may just go "Aha. Another angsty teenager going through one of her 'moments' and what does she know about life, she's only 15 and so she does not have the right to say such things which dont make sense cos HEY! She hasn't even lived past the teenager age".

Well, I've got two words for you. SHUT UP.

I want to live a day where I really dont think of anything disturbing and to actually be able to say that I was 100% happy for a day. Which I doubt is really possible cos 24 hours, in this case, is way way WAY too long to actually accomplish such amazing things. And besides, it wouldnt be life, if that were to happen, right? Not really at least.

And yes, as you may have already guessed, this has evolved to an entry where I rant and vent and write anything as I please. Simply for the reason that I'm apprently "in the mood". So if you're not happy, there's always that tiny cross on the top right hand corner of this page, thank you very much.

Tolerate and accept. Ring any bells? Well, right now, I'm wondering how much can one really "tolerate and accept" before you OD-ed on "good natured" pills then snap faster than you can say "forgive and forget".

I mean to even tolerate is bad, from what I've been taught by numerous "educators" as well as certain first hand accounts. They all say that one should just accept it (person/situation) so it'd be easier on you cos then you wouldnt harbour such "bad natured" feelings to even begin with.

But how I don't know. Call me impossible, but how exactly do you accept something you don't even LIKE?

Okay, so given the situation that I've had a bad day so far and it's only 12 o'clock in the afternoon. What do I do? I dont tolerate it, I ACCEPT it and so I dont do everything in my power to better my day, cos you know what, I've ACCEPTED the fact that today's a bad day?

It's like saying to accept menstrual cramps when you're totally tolerating it!!

Even when you tolerate right, it's like there ARE limitations, no? So whether you choose to tolerate or accept, it doesnt make much of a differance. To me at least. Cos from what I've learned, they both ammount to the same damn thing. And that, my friends, is called blowing up.

SIGH. I dont know what I'm getting at, really, just that it feels pretty good to let off some steam. Shall we continue? Okay, good.

Why is it that some people NEVER learn? Maybe I'm not exactly in the right position to even mention it. But hey, I think I'm way better than some others who, I've realised are really really really naive. Or stupid. Or ignorant. Or selfish. Or stupid. Oh wait, I've mentioned stupid before.

It's like, people here (yours truly as a fine example) are trying to improve the situation, y'know? And what do they do?! They make things harder. They get on your nerves like that *snaps*! It takes two to tango okay. Why am I even bothering when you're not taking it as cue for you to do something about it too!?

Because I'm nice, and I'm feeling like a good Samaritan. So yes, I do my part. But do you? Oh no, you don't. You don't even flick your eyes at my effort. You just continue as you are. And that, is really pissing me off. You are so immature and selfish, to the extent that I actually feel sorry for you. Really, I do.

Okay. Another topic to rant about. People who think they are right all the time, just cos they're older. Excuse me, but I really don't think that warrants you to that "right" - that you're right all the time. Cos you know what. Nobody is. Right all the time that is. Nobody.

It's just cos you're mad at yourself for not being smarter. You're mad cos I beat you to it, whatever it may be at that point of time. You're mad cos your life, is seriously, nothing but a mess. You're mad cos you're not doing things you thought you should be doing right now.

So I don't retaliate, cos I'm better than that. I don't give you that satisfaction. Instead, I sit there, and play dumb. Giving you the impression that you are, of course, the hero, and I'm the baddie. In actual fact, you're the silly one.

And your "smart remarks" are not even smart to begin with. If I wanted, I could devour every inch of your flesh. I could chew it slowly, bit by bit. I could you know. I really could. But nope. I choose to swallow you whole. You're that insignificant (for this very moment).

You know the African egg-eating snake? I'm just swallowing the egg whole, for now. Stretching my neck just so I can do that. I don't break you. Just yet. Once the egg is in the snake's throat, however, this remarkable thing happens.

The roof of this snake's throat contains its own built-in saw, and it uses this tool to saw the egg open, allowing the juicy contents to flow into its stomach. Then, it neatly folds up the empty egg shell before throwing it up as a small white pellet.

Too bad I've decided it's not the day for me to sharpen that built-in saw, presently as blunt as your grey matter. I can't wait to throw up that small white pellet. I really can't wait. But as I'm quite fond of saying, patience is virtue.

Goodbye everyone.

1:34 PM


10 December 2005

Another one I know you'll hate!

Quick updates on the past few days!

Let's see. Weds, went over to Aniszah's around 7+, 8 in the evening t
o get some Amaths hw done. Isz, her brother, is such great help! Why do some people not get confused by this particular thing called Mathematics?! I just don't get it! Both the subject and how some people find it easy. Burh.

Caught Tuesdays with Morrie on Hallmark at her place
! My god. What a nice movie. Morrie really looks like what I envisioned him to be! Haha. Say it. I'm cool. :D

Speaking of movies, I've caught truckloads of movies this past week. Okay, fine. Yes, I confess, a bum I've been. ):

Anyway! Lightning and Thunder remember me too! Okay, FYI, they are two BLACK cats which my family took care of for a while but it's really theirs (Aniszah's fam). Now now, you superstitious freaks. No, they are perfectly harmless. Lightning is such a softie I tell you. And Thunder just has that "bad boy" thing , okay more like "bad cat" thing going on, but underneath all that, he melts faster than uh. Butter? I don't know what I'm talking about.

Ohohoh! Her 6 year old sister, Aina, loves me! Haha. She was being so sweet and cute! She snuggled up to me while we were watching TV y'know! She even drew me this picture of her, Niz, and I. So sweet. I'd rather a younger sister than a younger brother. But then again, you'll never be satisfied with what you've got. And that's the beauty of it! (:

Ended up sleeping over. Hah. Silly me forgot that CC trg was in the afternoon. So, I took the first 372, then ran for the 27 and finally sleepily boarded the 291 home. Managed to reach home by 6.15 in the morning! That's an amazing feat okay!

Annoyingly, my stomach was giving me problems. Hmm. Great timing. So, I was in great discomfort throughout the entire 3 bus rides when I could have been sleeping peacefully like all the other passengers! GAH.

After receiving an SMS from Xiuqi who reminded me that it was in the afternoon, heaved a sigh of relieve, took some Panadol, plonked on my bed and headed off to a nice slumber.

Come 11ish, woke up and felt much better. Got ready and left for school. CC trg was the usual I suppose. (:


Friday! Was supposed to head over to Clara's at 9.30! My brilliant idea to convert to a morning person. Hah, I wish! Got up considerably early, SMS-ed Lee, than crawled over to my mom's bed, dragging along my bolster and comforter and snuggled up to Kieffy!

It was raining pretty heavily, making so much noise pitter pattering on the air con thingy outside. I found the rhythm very hypnotising? Haha. Okay, weird I know. I was in that weird state where I alternate between being asleep and awake. My mother thought it was fun to switch off the air con and pull the curtains apart!!


It must be fun tormenting your daughter. As a consolation, let's hope I'll be able to find the joy in doing that in about.... okay who knows how long?!

For equality's sake, I stormed into my brother's room and did the same thing. It's only fair okay! And if you were wondering? I'm a wonderful sister to that brat of a nine year old. (: No, you weren't wondering? Oh who cares. (:

Caught Oprah and I was so moved I felt like I could flood the the house! Can you imagine, going for a walk at 6.15 in the morn, you return home, 15 minutes later, to find all four of your kids dead, shot by your ex husband, who commited suicide right after killing his own kids?!

My god. Nothing, I repeat, nothing can possibly excuse anybody for doing such a horre
ndous, selfish thing. Regardless of how "empty" you feel or the fact that you've just realised that you're merely a ghost wandering about, simply existing and not really living it at all and whatever depressing situation you're currently in till you feel suicidal and on the verge of snapping, etc. Regardless okay. Regardless.

It was so incredibly sad hearing all those stories from all those mothers who've experienced the Worst Day of Their Lives, all involving their kids. It was really really sad. It makes you feel so darn lucky, y'know?

Anyway, only reached at Clara's around noon. Watched some TV, had instant pizza for lunch, watched Jersey Girl, and finally got started on some work.

Jersey Girl's a nice movie. Nothing spectacular, exactly. But still. Ben Affleck's hot and I like Liv Tyler plus the girl's cute and the story was cute too!

Eventually, we decided to go to the barbecue. Walked a good half an hour before we finally found the friggingly annoying pitch which was so far away! Like any other BBQ, the problem was getting the fire started! Grr. I really look forward to the day I attend a BBQ with a sucessful fire without the help of a guy/parent.

The barbecue went well, I suppose. The last part was the best. Where everyone went nuts and started cheering (okay so it was more like shouting and screaming) out to the sea! At night! When it was all dark and couples are seen at every turn, all ready to strangle us silent, I'll bet!

Hilda, was especailly insane. She was possesed, I'm sure. Who would've thought? (: Oh you know, we even shooed away people! Like there was this particular tent, near us, we cheered like mad and soon after, they packed up! To either shift or something. Hey, it is a free country, at besides, it's still early! They probably just all wanted to have mass sex without all the "distractions".

Left East Coast around... okay I'm not too sure exactly. But whatever it was, I was super beat, I missed my stop. How typical. You know. That's my newest bad habit. Missing stops. No further elaboration, cos it's too freaking embarrassing!

Caught Down with Love on Star Movies and I think Renee is really cute! Haha. She's funny lah. Plus she can walk in this really crazy seductive manner (cos the role called for it) and it just cracks me up! Ewan Mcgregor's good looking. So there was definitely no lacking of eye candy there.

Oh yeah. I also caught Girls Just Want to Have Fun early this week. And it's a cool movie! Starring Sarah Jessica Parker and Helen Hunt when they were really young, like in their teens!
The lead guy looks a bit like Tom Welling the Blonde.

I like watching movies of the 80s cos everything's just different! Like the dressing, the culture, so to speak and what not. So yeah. It's fun.

Oh before I forget! Today's Taufik Batisah's 24th birthday! Heard from Maziah that he has this birthday party. Apparently, you have to book in advance or something of that sort. If it was a year ago, you can bet your butt I'll be there. But it's not last year. So too bad Taufik! Your loss! :D

All the "Taufik talk" reminds me of how things were like a year ago dragged on to early this year. And once again, I'd have to thank Toffa! Okay lah. I'll tell you. She managed to fix us (her, her cousin, her cousin's best friend, her second cousin, her second cousin's best friend, me and Siti) a date with Taufik!

We had a good 1 and a half hours with him okay! So bloody cool. But he's a bit too smooth and flirtatious for my liking. I mean. Well, if a guy's way too smooth, that hardly ever is good right. Hidden agenda and all that "ladies' man" crap to live up to.

But then again, I guess it'd be nice to be with a guy who's smooth and charming just not TOO smooth and charming. But I wouldnt want a guy who's so insecure and fumbles about all the time either! Though a bit of that klutz-ish thing is quite cute, actually. Like Seth Cohen/Adam Brody! Okay, I can so see Mariam all smiley like an idiot. (:

Okay yuck. Contradictions suck.

ANYWAY. I know I must start blogging more regularly, so I wont end up with shit long posts of the describing-my-day sort. It's boring. Will "spice it up" in time to come. Till then, ciao babes.

10:30 PM


06 December 2005

LIME Sonic Bang

Feasting time! Pictures! Yes, I know. FINALLY. Now, I shall tell you the story of the day of the LIME Sonic Bang thing. Getting utterly boring describing events, but hey! It's not as if you didn't come here to read about me, anyways! (:

We, being me, Niz, Mar and Mud, (Hmm. The 3 lettered folks), decided that attending to the stomach was of more importance than being there early to get good seats. Though it's free standing, but you'll know what I mean later.

On our way to Taka, we came across this old man who was doing some hula-hoop stunt, only using this HUGE beady necklace around his neck. It was quite freaky lah. And so incredibly poor thing. I mean, the guy's so old! And to have to resort to such things! Being the kind people that we are, Niz and I donated some cash. But it was quite impressive, too? Okay. SHUT UP HUDA.

Went into Taka, and we were greeted by this BIG Christmas tree. It was right smack in the middle of the 1st floor. Damn, it was so pretty!

Mud was in this really weird position ala playing Twister when he took that (points to previous pic) shot. Since, he was the only guy there, we got him to kiss BALLS! (Okay, actually no, it's not cos he's the only guy dominated by 3 girls. Man, that sounded wrong! But it's....... just because.)

Okay, fine. So it's just ONE ball. And he didn't really kiss it even! Gah! No fun one! So we went on to the huge food place and snacked on some rather good snacks. Then Najib came and so we headed to that free space near Youth Park/ behind Cine, where the thing's held.

We were EARLY! So the girls looked around the flea market, where it really IS a flea market flea market! Meaning, sort of garage-sale-ish, meaning cool second hand stuff! BUT, too bad I'm broke. Hah. So yeah. Lucky me.

Niz on the other hand, bought this super nice black shirt frm Mango at only 10 bucks! It looks brand new btw. The best part? I, here was the one that helped her rummage through that box of $10 goodies! Sigh. What to do. I'm amazing. (:

After walking around some more, we met up with the boys and headed on to find a good spot to watch the concert.

To our dismay, we saw this whole CHUNK of people already sitting down RIGHT IN FRONT of the stage! So fine, perhaps we came too late. Or maybe they camped overnight just to get the good view! *gasps* (Sarcasm here, if you didnt manage to grasp that.)

We realised they were groupies! (Except. I highly doubt they have sex with their idol(s) cos it's just..... Well, it's Singapore! Nothing further, your honour. I rest my case.) They were Kelly fans, she's one of the Project Superstar contestants, from what I've gathered, COMPLETE with the standardized tshirt.

So alright, then.

So then, Daniel Ong comes on, the host, (big shocker there!) and they still remained seated. He tried to get then to bloody stand up, but nope, of COURSE they didnt listen. So Dan thought, Okay. So maybe they dont like me, being the insecure DJ that he is.

The first act comes on, this group of girls/guys dancing with really cool steps. Attack of the micro minis, of course. Did they stand up? Oh hell no.

Urgh. They are so friggin' inconsiderate okay! I mean, yah. So you came for your friggin' idol and what not. BUT STILL. At least show some courtesy to the other acts! JEEZ. Some people really tick me off. Presenting, the tickoffers.

We were giving them shit cold stares and the occasional push where we go "Hello. They should just stand up you know. But they ARE a bunch of inconsiderate people." and stuff hinting for them to stand up cos it's just so bloody rude! Did they listen? Why don't you make a guess.

In fact, when we keep on shooting remarks, their reaction was SO disappointing. They just returned killer stares OR they pretended they didnt hear anything but that's just bullshit cos I made sure they heard me. Conclusion? Either, one, their butts were glued to the ground, two, their butts are really THAT heavy or three, they are just inconsiderate people. My bet? The latter.


Oh, even the Junyang or whoever, his supporters remained seated too. Hmm. What you trying to show huh? That their fans are just a bunch of people who disregard courtesy just cos THEY LOVE YOU SO MUCH they cant bear to waste their energy to stand up.

What a nice image they paint, I'm sure.

The thing is, I'm really, so very appalled by the way they behaved! I mean, seriously! If BSB were to perform, and their opening act is like, maybe Leslie Carter, Nick's sister who's shot at the music industry really sucked, and I doubt any of you has heard of her before, cos even I've never heard any of her songs before, or maybe even Howie's sister, Penelope, who shared the same fate as Leslie, I'd still stand up for either one fo them. I mean, if the arrangements were like the LIME thing.

UGH. Just recalling the whole thing makes me so peeved. Enough about inconsiderate shitheads already. The entire time I took to write about them, I've rolled my eyes a good too many times, I'm surprised they didnt get stuck when I was at halfroll.

The concert was pretty alright I guess. There was this band, The Observatory, that makes DEATH music. I swear, their music either reminds you of funerals, or the kind of music that makes you think of flashbacks of your entire life, cos you know what. You're about to die any second now. It's just... death music.

Ronin, was pretty good. The lead sure knows how to entertain. I CANNOT believe he went down to hug that bunch of uh, huge minahs with horrible makeup and weird messy pigtails which was meant to give the "cute" result, only it turned out to be without the adorable part. Just ugly. =/

But yes. He's a good entertainer. They sang Sweet child of Mine y'know! And one more song by Guns 'n' Roses, if I'm not mistaken. Electrico finally came on! Amanda's outfit, to me, was rather odd. But the others thought it was cute, so fine. BUT IT'S STILL WEIRD.

I kind of like the lead of Electrico, what's his name? I think he's a good performer too. All hot and sweaty! HAHA.

OH YEAH! We also saw Shan and Jeff from Eye for a Guy! I didn't even catch the series except for the last episode, and even then, I didnt quite enjoy it. I still think that Shan's a HORRIBLE DJ, and he was one of the major factors that made me give up all hopes on Perfect Ten and pushed me to convert to a 1/4 time Power 98 and 3/4 time Class 95 listener.

And Jeff? Heck, I wasnt even sure if that was his name lah! Najib, of all people confirmed it for us. I mean, yeah, we recognized him. But can you imagine, if we called him the WRONG name?! Paiseh, paiseh, paiseh like no shit! So yes. We weren't huge fans of them, or anything.

But hey, they're pretty cute. :D

We took with Shan first, then went back, then finally decided to take with Jeff too. I swear Mariam is such an idiot for not helping me get out of the mud! Just cos I wasnt wearing sneaks, like HER, she had to be such a cow. As usual. (: BUT THEN!

Jeff caught my arm as I was about to leave and suddenly went "Your name?" Freak lah. I was surprised. Thank god my mouth was still functioning. "Huda. My name's Huda.". "Hi Huda. I'm Jeff". (I was so tempted to go "Yeah, I know. Duh. I wouldnt have approached you if I didnt know who you are" but then, I wasnt too sure what his name was in the first place. -.-")


Cos I was suddenly reminded of the fugly blisters-turned-peely-thingys on my right palm! SIGH. Bummer of the day man. GRRRRR!!

But yes, LIME was right. The Casanova, he is. (:

After Electrico, the guys went off. They were weird lah. You see, they were supposed to go home around 8, 8.30 to catch a football match. But they decided to stay on. And whenever Mud receives an SMS from God knows who, the two would suddenly go "YES! High 5 man! YEAH!". Cos the team they were rooting for just scored. Sheesh. BOYS. *shakes head*

Soon after, Niz and I decided to leave for dinner too. Mar stayed on with her friends who happened to be there as well. We went to BK for a late no-good dinner! Ronin was there, and so was Dapne! Haha. Oh, have I mentioned that I was shocked by her performance? No? Well, yeah. I was. Firstly, her outfit was Fwoah! Secondly, she sang Britney's Overprotected. And Thirdly, she freaking DANCED to that song too! Say wow people. WOWZERS. @.@ (Is that even the right smiley? I'm not even sure, but nvm.)

HRMPH. About our dinner. BK was jampacked. Obviously, since there's a big event just outside Cine. Strangely, BK has a number of tables meant for six and fewer meant for fours and twos. Since there was no where else, we sat on the six seater.

Dont shoot me yet since I was going on and on and on about inconsiderate people. I did separate a table as far as we could, so a pair could seat there without feeling awkward. But, the BK person just pushed it right back. I was like "But there's only 2 of us here." The guy was like "Nvm. Nvm. Too squeezy."

I suppose he had a point cos just a wee bit tiny push and there'd be no pathway, not that that pathway was even THAT existent in the first place.

So then, there came this family of three. The mom's Indian, the dad's Caucasion and their teenage daughter. I doubt they're Singaporeans form their accent and well, they're accent.

There was no where else to seat. The father was buying the food, the mother, who's using a walking stick btw, was standing with her daughter right beside our table. Mother, here, was complaining about how INCONSIDERATE the "kids" (teenagers hanging around in BK) were.

WHY? Cos they were taking their own sweet time eating their remaining fries and finishing their drinks while chatting away with their friends.

And then, I offered to part the table again. Mother shot me a look that probably meant "Oh like that's of much use", which kind of bothered me. But Niz and I were in the middle of an interesting conversation so I was WTH-ing her in my mind while shooting Niz a look that was meant to be "What's HER problem!? Annoying crap."

But I bet Niz was confused as hell, cos she didnt see the mother giving me the look in the first place. Dang, I just LOVE the way females shoot looks around expecting the receiver to know exactly what it means, despite the ZERO vocal part of communication. SIGH. (Sarcasm here too, btw.)

Then, the father here came along to join them. They continued their "Kids here are so..... blahblahblah" conversation, even pulling aside a BK staff to question how come the "kids" are allowed to linger here even though they've basically finished their meal. Except for the fries and drinks so it means they've NOT finished their meals! GAH!

I was in the midst of thinking Man. Poor guy. Attacked for no reason. when they plonked beside us. Obviously they were hinting us to move in and CRAM into the 2 seater table while they enjoy and extra seat.


Of course I didnt move in! URGH!

1. YOU ARE RUDE. I will only reciprocate with regards of how you act.
2. Just because you are using a walking stick, it doesnt mean you get to push people around as and when you feel like it.
3. Since you're so "disturbed" by the "kids" why dont you just pack up your food and head for the door?!
4. If you want such FANTASTIC service, dont go to fast food restaurants! But heck, you're so in the wrong country if you want top notch customer service.
5. It's at NIGHT. It's a hangout cum eating place for young people. There's an EVENT outside. Do the math.

GOD. Sometimes, I really hate it when UPPITY people go about making a big deal out of everything. Oh and you know what. 5 minutes later, this group seating on a 6seater left but unlike THEM, this group of girls who WAITED PATIENTLY for seats, got what they wanted.

We had to suffer listening on to their conversations, cos we were in no position to have a conversation between us cos it was so CLOSE and well, I hate having conversations with people listening on for no darn reason. I mean, that's the same for most of us right?

So yes. We decided to PERSEVERE on and munch as SLOWLY as possible. They left first. HAH! We win! Okay, I know. Immature and petty and stupid. But whatever. In true Clara style: We're young and stupid and so we do stupid things. (:

Took the train home. After much comtemplation, cos she has work the next day as well as her teacher's wedding to attend, she decided to sleepover! YAY.

So yep. Washed up and we immediately hit the sack! Cos well, tired lah!

My goodness. I am so long winded and naggy! Yuck. Oh yeah. I woke up at 7.10 today to catch Bring It On Again and How To Deal on HBO. The first movie kindda sucked. But the second one rocked! I still remember, back in Sec 1 how many times I wanted to catch it, but ended up watching another movie. I like Mandy Moore. And I liked it when she was with Andy Roddick too! SIGH.

Okay then. See ya. Ciao babes!(:

Me and Niz, Najib and Mud. I want to play more pool!!!!!!!!!! Oh and the change of skin is cos i'm quite sick of it already. It's been since what? JULY?! So yes. Even though it's simple shit, it still beats mediorcrity. Which is a complete irony cos the now skin is like SUPER mediocre as compared to mine, previously. HAHA. Okay. Nvm.

3:21 PM

04 December 2005

This is for dearest Rachel! So, this thing goes like this. You write your five weird/strange habits, then at the end of it, write 5 names. Tag their boards, ask them to read your blog. Then, the cycle continues. Don't cha just love repetitive, cliche crap? (:

Haha.. Okay, so five weird/strange habits eh? I have tons. This is gonna be tough.

1. I have the ability to block out feelings in this really freaky way. It's scary. It's inhumane, even.
2. I love to scrutinize people's flaws and poke fun at theirs, but then I forget I have my own set to worry about.
3. I really hate it when people do without empathy. And then I'm reminded of the gazillion times I do that myself.
4. When I'm pissed, the bitch within emerges. Naturally. But I think mine can really go beyond accepted lengths.
5. I like to think of myself as this but then when the truth hits or when someone suggests otherwise, I don't go about un-thinking myself as that. I guess you could say I'm a fool. In some ways at least.

You, you, you, you and YOU.

Actually, I have quite a fair bit of stuff to blog about. But, I'm not gonna do so, till I have the pics from MARIAM. Talk about smooth, Casanova! And well, I'm getting pretty sleepy. I also think that The Whole Ten Yards is bo-ring! I don't know why I thought it'd be a pretty entertaining movie. Ohwells.

Also, my sister's suddenly all writer-ish. She's goes nuts over Smallville and CLOIS (Clark+Lois, geddit?). So, she spent the past 2 weeks, staring at the computer screen. And the result? Her very first season, the equivalence of 25 chapters mind you, of her very own fan fict, which revolves around Smallville (duh), CLOIS especially, and even Bruce Wayne! That's Batman btw, you clueless person! With referances to the comic series, plus Batman Begins and whathaveyous. Oh, plus, she just started on her second season.

Ah, now that's what you'd call someone suffering from some obsessive disorder, or something. :D

So, she forced me to sit and stare and SPEED READ the entire thing this afternoon. Gosh, I very nearly died, thanks to the glare. But I gotta admit, it's pretty good. Hmm. Cheers eh? And now, after all that, she's curently having a writer's block and needs my help. What can I say? I save lives. Hah, I wish! Anyways, so we spent a good few hours planning the plot. It was rather fruitful, I must say.

So yeah. Come visit here to check it out! Damn, I'm sucha good sister.

So much for being sleepy. The fingers just wont stop!! So that's all then! Ciao babes!

7:20 PM

02 December 2005

Hey everyone. You know what, the past two days, I've been coming home feeling so great. (: Ah... The wonders of life, how weird and twisted it gets sometimes and things fall into place just like that. Cos I'm sure 100%, what I did ytd was SINFUL. But, it felt so darn good! Perhaps better than sex? HAH! How the hell would I know?!

I have to say this though, before moving on to mentioning anything else. Sounds far more dramatic than intended. Oh wells. Campcraft training, is tough. It touches on a lot of other aspects other than just skills, if you think about it. Like I can see the change and progress already and it's only been 2 official trainings! Whatever it is, I know it'll all work out fine in the end. It always does. (:

Yesterday! After Campcraft training, went to Tampines Mall with Hilda, meeting Siewhwee. The journey was cool. Cos 67 was just too comfortable! Or maybe we were just that beat. I bet it's the latter.

So anyways, had lunch at Seoul Garden. We were stuffing ourselves like crap okay! We looked like first timers. Like never eat buffet before. Haha. We did something bad! HILDA LAH. Stuff it!! Make it turn black! Hurry! And then, after doing what we did, we fled. HAHA. We're NEVER gonna eat at TM's Seoul Garden ever again, man. Boy, do security cameras suck.

Then, we decided it'd be safer to hang around Century Square. I swear, it must be her unlucky day. Cos dearest fusher here (Hilda), did another bad thing. By accident. (:

Caught Prime at Century. It was nice and sweet! God that guy's hot! Bryan Greenberg. There were so many make out scenes, I half thought that was all they were good at. Haha. Okay, MEAN. But, the other two found it draggy! What can I say. I guess in terms of movies, I'm somewhat easily satisfied. And you know what! I like predictable stories! At least you know what to expect and well, the JOURNEY to the predictable parts count right! And I think Uma Thurman looks really good, considering her age and all. And I don't see any crow's feet... maybe she was just glowing with happines and youth (from what I see) that the presence of crow's feet weren't even significant! Oh righttt. Hollywood=Plastic. How could I forget? See, I'm starting to rattle.

Speaking of movies, I watched The Girl Next Door with my parents on Star Movies just now. My brother was kicked out to play with his stupid gameboy (which REALLY is pretty stupid cos I was once addicted to it and now, I've been stained.) Haha. It was rather weird. With my dad there. I mean, yah, I've watched RA movies with my mum before. But even a movie, rated 16, felt quite weird watching it with him around! But the movie's cool lah. Elicia Cuthbert's so hot. Has she acted in any other movie before? Or maybe that was her first? A one hit wonder or something?

Today. Campcraft training was well... never mind. After the training. Now that, I'm very happy about. Let's just say, and I'm being repetitive here, that things fell into place nicely. Like it was fate. Meant to be and all. Eeee yuck. Getting mushy! Haha. But yes. It was all good. Really good. Spread the love! (:

Learnt something new today. Adversity quotient. AQ. Found it pretty interesting.

Anyways, Mud sms-ed me just now and he proposed for us to go to this gig tomorrow. Electrico. He and that band. But I'm not exactly in the right place to say anything about it, eh? BACKSTREET BOYS! They're number one on Power 98's Top 10 Climax today btw. God they're awesome! (GARY! HAHA.)

A question related to the movie Prime. What's the max age gap for you? 10 years? 15? 20 even? All for the sake of love? Even though you know there will be talk about you being a gold digger and all.... I find this rather intriguing. I don't know why. There's just something about scandal that makes you smile. Admit it already!

I suddenly feel like eating at Sakura! Haha. Very out of place, but well yeah. EH, SO WHO'S JOINING ME ON THE 24th? :D

11:29 PM

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Name: Huda
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If there's one word to describe this girl, it'd be loud. She's easy going and incredibly fun. She'd like to think of herself as approachable (though some claim she looks arrogant and/or fierce). She's highly opinionated and outspoken. Friends insist she's fickle and whines an awful lot. At times, acid-tongued, especially when provoked. A hopeless romantic, that she is. A dreamer. Her mood and emotions fluctuate about in this outrageous manner. Pretty bubbly, loves a good conversation anytime, anywhere. She appreciates beauty of all forms. Quite the idealist, an avid mind wanderer, she'd say. She also finds the horoscope incredibly fascinating. Trust me, you'll love her, if you don't already do. (:

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