Red Hot Passion
31 July 2006

Anna Nalick says it loud and clear

Hi. How was your day? Cos mine was fab. (:

Skipped school and spent the day with Fatmah studying in Starbucks. Back to the norms. Back to the familiar territory, so different yet so similar. Back to those times, I'd go really sick and stupid with joy whenever -. Back to the safe aroma of coffee. Back to those days.

It was a nice day. I can be bothered to elaborate, cos I'm down for tution at 8.30. OMG. 8.30-10.30. Today and tomorrow night! Organic Chem. Die, bitch, die. ):

HAHAH. Hey gorgeous! I know you're nt gna read this cos you "dont read blogs". But I found this cute pair at Tamp Central! How about that! (: Tenbucks. I'm gna drag you over, to painfully (and hopefully helpfully) select *the* pair. I'm omf excited. You could tell right, just now? :D I WANT IT.

Thanks babe, for all that talk about stuff after Cedar. We're kinda in the same shoes? Remember how I sounded so sure? I'm not anymore. ):

WHYWHYWHY am I writing to you even thought you wont read it?!

I've not made up my mind about anything. Well, maybe except that. To leave it at that. (:


It grips me so firm sometimes. Firm and inviting. Such welcome. Like the familiar smell of old books. Like the hint of a Mother's love. Soaking in its warmth standing right before me. Shamelessly. A blink later, it's gone. Gone is the comfort. Gone is the security. Gone is the escape. And back are the walls so high up. The fort you built for god knows what reason. So walled up, that you are. Break it down. Please. Bit by bit. It's worth a shot. I look at you looking at me. Uncertainty. Confusion. Bring down those bricks, one by one.

Just so you know. We wear the same pair of shoes. Might as well walk in them together.

What am I doing.

But you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button now
Sing it if you understand.
and breathe, just breathe

7:39 PM



How do you turn your eyes
From the romantic glare

Oh, I really should have known

How do you numb your skin
After the warmest touch

How do you slow your blood
After the body rush

9:26 AM


I know what you're doing

Hilarious. What's your problem? Bitch.

4:37 AM


I told her to take a shot of this! I like how it doesnt look like Singapore.  Posted by Picasa

4:30 AM


Showing off her talent. Posted by Picasa

4:29 AM


You didn't notice the oil okay? Hey. It was the end of the day already lah. Wahlau. Posted by Picasa

4:28 AM


I look cute, dont I? (: Posted by Picasa

4:27 AM


Aw. Sho Shweet. I look bodiless tho. Posted by Picasa

4:23 AM


I like this pic.  Posted by Picasa

4:22 AM


Unglam, eh? Posted by Picasa

4:22 AM


Oh whoops. Bad aim, there. Posted by Picasa

4:21 AM


McCafe's my new fav. Haha. Cheap AND good. Gotta love it. Posted by Picasa

4:21 AM


Presenting to ya. Sophia.. Posted by Picasa

4:20 AM


The amazing singer who does Jewel justice!  Posted by Picasa

4:20 AM


Me! Ignore the bad hair, and take note of the emoness. HAHA. I think it's funny.  Posted by Picasa

4:19 AM


Random shot. The booth somehow looks pretty old skool.  Posted by Picasa

4:19 AM


Stwipe powerrr!! Sry you had to squint. Posted by Picasa

4:18 AM


Taufik look alike! I know it's blur. But well. I had to be on the low! Posted by Picasa

4:18 AM


These two days

Hello. My moods have been really really muddled up these days! But presently, all's quite good. Me thinks.

Okay, so Saturday! It was a lovely day. (:

Met up with dearest Clara for lunch, after such a long list of absence! I missed ya a lot babe! If this keeps up, oh man. It'll suck even more when you leave for Australia! ): No no. There's still this thing called emails.

It just so happened her tution was at TM. After browsing around, decided to lunch at BaliThai. The food was superb. Green curry! (Which kinda reminded me the other time Tricia, you and me ate at ThaiExpress over a year ago!) It was nice catching up and all that. Even though we're still in the same school. It's like. Schedules clash and stuff. So I don't see her all that often. Which is a great pity!

So it was great seeing yah proper! (:

After that trained to CityHall to meet Mel! See, it was that morning itself, she phoned me, and proposed a study date.

We had some difficulty locating *the* spot to camp for the next few hours. Went from Esplanade to Marina Square. And you know what. We ended up settling for Macs. Haha. What a place to study, I know.

McCafe's not all that bad. (I recall myself scoffing at it, so maybe you scoffed too? Hah.) Had my first taste of it the other time at Parkway's outlet with Mud and Jib. Remember guys? My brother got that fucking huge cup of Hot Chocolate which was so nicely decorated with the chocolate syrup! Haha. The day you guys found out about... and Najib took it so terribly he had to go up and ask that stranger for one cos he was out?

There's this Taufik look alike that served me! He's cuter than Taufik though. Haha. Well anyway, after we were done with work, walked around, and oohh! Saw this lovely pair of maroonishblack rimmed glasses that were degreeless. And you know what. We both tried it and looked good may I add! Eh I wanna get it! Haha. It makes me look. I dont know. Quite like a librarian bitch, you know that kind? Haha.

Long story short, we walked about and camwhored.

Haha. There was this random old couple shooting us confused looks. As if going "Ah, so this is what the young ones do nowadays with a camera." We (or rather she) managed to snap a couple of really artistic shots.

We met a whole familiy of Stwipe Power! *insides. Even managed to snap a photo of them! So there we were, snapping random pics. When I thought I was hallucinating when I heard Jewel! My mind totally went frantic. "Oh my god. Mel, is that Standing Still?!" "Huh? *continues snapping photos"

So I went first to that area there. And witnessed this talented singer named Sophia/Sofia, local mind you and she was GREAT. She sang Jewel beautifully. (: It was really really nice. Watched her perform a couple more songs. And you know what. I love all the songs she sang. It's all of the Mellow-Jewel-Sarah sort. It was really beautiful. Amazing. *sigh. Everything was just wonderful. Only one more thing to make it complete.

I really enjoyed the performance. It was a real pity we didnt head over to Esplanade earlier.

On this note, I think Jann Arden and Sarah McLachlan make a really brilliant duo. WOW.

Headed home soon after. Not before snapping a couple more "classics" in the Mrt Station.

Today! Met Mel again at Tamp Central before heading off for tuition. She wanted to browse for jeans. Claiming that she doesnt own a single decent pair. She lies. Cos I've seen her in jeans! But she insists that she doesn't own a nice pair!

After scouting a while more, had lunch and went our separate ways. I went to tuiton, alone. You asshole Zai. Go M'sia, wth?! Lol.

Tuition was really productive, actually. Organic Chem, is no funny matter. ):

Okay, everyone. Go here, and sign up to be a Hello member. Why? Because I'm a member and it transfers photos so fucking fast, you won't believe it. Go sign up! So next time, when you send me pics, it'll take half as long. (:

It's 3.43 you guys. Haha. I amaze myself sometimes. Good morning!

1:51 AM


27 July 2006

Blogger decided to love me again.

Okay, a quick overview/recap of Siti's 16th. (Damn. If only I do this for study purposes.)
  • It was really fun.
  • Lyon serenaded her "Always" by Bon Jovi! Now that's the kinda guy we'd all love to have. (see third pic!) He sang to her while putting on the engraved ring (which says Lyon <3> Irah/ Sweet sixteenth). Someone kill me already. Dying with jealousy here! ):
  • He too was dared. Haha. Ended up eating a - which um. Let's just say uh "went through a lot". LOL (;
  • Sathish is really some idiot man. (Lyon's friend who tagged along.) LOL.
  • She had to blow candles, not once, not twice, but thrice. First the ice cream cake, then the firehouse (which was on the house since it's her birthday) and the third was another firehouse we ordered for ourselves.
  • When the whole hoard of Swensens' staff brought the cake, they had this CLOWN hats on, jinggling some weird random toy. Hahah.
  • She opened her presents and was pleasantly surprised!
  • Some of the stuff we got her: a MNG top, this gorgeous Zara black and gold stripped shrug that I was really tempted to get for myself. Fatmah had to tear the plastic bag away from me later. Haha. Also, this really cute seashell-cover mini book thingy full of our well wishes, all conveniently in one booklet.
  • Fatmah got her this really HUMONGOUS Grandma knickers as a personal card, so fugly (and funny) we all nearly pissed from laughing. Actually for all you know, some of us may have just.. Nevermind.
  • The bunch of us trooped to Esplanade to catch Baybeats but ended up mainly taking pictures!
Let the pictures do their thang! Here are a couple of pics, not all cos I'm lazy and I know if I "fully exploit" the love Blogger has given me, I'd be in deep shit; (meaning com fucks up) from Siti's 16th. No matter how I try to get used to calling her Irah, I always fail. You're still Siti to me. Hah.

Alright people. Done here. RHD pics another day lah kay. The Lazy Libran in action here. Sorry. Can't help adding that.


Hady, is making me weak in the knees! He's (damn!) really good! Ahh. That crazy fanatical side of me is emerging! OH GOD NO.

Caught Singapore Idol last night? You know there was something about how the guy contestants kept moving their hands up and down the mike stand. I just couldn't tear my eyes off their hands. LOL.

Jon Leong looked good with slicked back hair!

Enough Idol already, yeah.

Oh yeah. You know the badge given if you donate at the Tapestry gigs supporting the Orange Ribbon? (Btw, Orange Ribbon is to support Racial Harmony) Me & You = Trust. I only realised the "us" in the Trust just yesterday. Haha. I think the Tapestry landyard's (sp?) pretty too.

This morning. It was so retarded. I intended on returning Naz' book, Tuesdays with Morrie that I held captive for god knows how long. Whoops. But see, I didn't quite feel like reading 12th Night, The Bachelor of Arts or Newsweek. So I ended up reading that darn tear jerker by Mitch Albom.

I was feeling all emo and stuff. So yah. I kinda shed a tear or two. Okay fine. So it was more than a tear or two. But really. I love that book. Morrie rocks man. The Sixth Tuesday struck me the most. Also that chapter about Family. Sigh. Bloody tear jerkers.

Ah yes. Now, I officially have a MySpace account and a Friendster account. SHEEEEEEEEET. Hahah. So here's my "goodbye" to non conformity. ): Such are the weak willed. *Sigh

Okay, I just deleted a whole paragraph full of excuses. Decided it was pointless. See, the thing is no one forced me to make those accounts. I made them. It's mainly to keep in contact with the people I know. Really. HAHAHA. I couldn't resist it.

So yup. Be friendly and share your space. :D Ciao babes!

6:16 PM


25 July 2006

I heart Life As You Know It

My computer's screwed. A classic. I was halfway typing an entry, and all of a sudden the entire window closed by itself! Argh. Huda. wont. curse.

Since I'm not gna waste MORE time, shall keep it short yet sweet. (Hah, Liane!) Yesterday studied at the new Starbucks outlet in town. The one jammed in between Paragon and Heeren. It's nice and cozy. The baristas were really friendly too, as usual. If only Singapore's service were generally like that. Now, wouldn't that be nice.

Got to know Arsyad/Arshad. He's a, um, Malaynese? (Sounds like mayanoise!)Yup. Haha. (Meeting new people is like this sudden addiction or something, LOL.)

Studied there. Mud and Jib happened to be at Peninsular, so they dropped by. You'll never get bored with those two idiots. And Najib, I think you lie lor. I don't think my punches were as painless/pathetic as you claimed it was!

Had dinner at Cine's LJ, then they accompanied me to get my dad's present. Today's he's 50th. So old! Haha. I hope he likes his brown Picard wallet! He better. I could've bought TWO pairs of pumps okay! ): But I love my dad, especially more so now, ever since that "sharing" moment. (: He's only 50 but he can pass for a 55 y'know.

Anws, today! Us Bio droppers were supposed to have a total of four free periods. (Malay: Naz&I were viewing pics on the com, with card reader brought, everything!) The Bio period was fruitless. (What's new, yo.)

Fairuz and I were plugging in to Diana's Nano and listening to Mellow, Emo songs. Haha. Sigh. You know, ever since Mud sent me that song by Death Cab for Cutie, I'd play it at least once when I'm online. The song is such a melt-you-quick.

It was scary cos there was this one time where Mrs Tan walked by! AHAHAHA. We had to calmly, yet swiftly put it away. Close call, there. Being really friendly and nice (and fake, lol) works wonders sometimes.

Had Chem after. The entire class was just so dead. It'd be hilarious if someone were to record 4c's mood then. Heh. Ms Begam definitely got the hint.

After school, went straight to Siglap's Starbucks to study. Close to two hours later, Mar and Najib came, us three left for next door, when we saw Mud approaching.

Gelare, it was. Tuesday, fellas! Woohoo. Hungry. Large waffles with one scoop of ice cream. God, it was good. All of it was. The talk, the food, the company. (Things change, shut up ah.)

It was Rahimah's later. Zai finally arrived after his mock paper, and we sat and mooched till abut 7.

Home. Life as you know it! Woot! I thought the scene, where Ben ran out to find Sue after "ditching" his teacher-gf, only to see her getting down and dirty with another guy, and like, managed to get some guy to hand over his corsage to give to her! (cos earlier on, he kinda forgot about the corssage.)? It was really sad. Poor Ben!

The snippet for next week's shows his gf teacher being rather desperate? Can't wait for next week's episode to air! Ohh. Dino so hawt.

K, bye. Loveyah.

(I know the title's ALMOST irrelevant, but ah. I like it. Bye.)

11:54 PM



It's easier to believe in this sweet madness.

Hello, it drives me nuts.
Hi, it's not easy.
Hey, I need to say something.

Realised you mean a lot.

Bye, it kills me sometimes.

1:22 AM


23 July 2006

My open letter to you

Life sometimes throws a mighty big punch at you. What's puzzling is that you know what caused it. And yet you refuse to correct it. Too stubborn and proud to mend the broken ties.

But then again, sometimes things are the way they are. There's no underlying message. It's plain for all to see. There's no need to complicate matters and fabricate theories that mean bull. A wrong is still a wrong. To compensate for that wrong, the least you could do is make an effort.

And when we talk effort here, it means effort. Real effort. Not some stupid attempt (which makes it seem as though the whole thing's just that insignificant to you) to make things better. Even when it means putting yourself on the line. Hey it wasn't me who made you do whatever fucks you did, was it?

Forgiveness. It's the term one usually coins with mistakes, sins, the like. I don't think it's an easy task, for anybody. It takes steps. Minute, baby steps. Only then will it heal properly and fully, bearing no visible bruises. Perhaps a lesson, nothing more.

What would you rather? Instantaneous, and shortlasting? Yeah I thought so.

I need some time too okay. It was one helluva kick to my pride. The cause was dumb, yeah I admit. Trivial. But it's these kinda things that speaks a lot more, speaking for matters of depths so amazing, it blows you away.

I do care. God are you kidding?! Of course I do. You see things have been rather smooth sailing the whole journey since day one. And then this had to happen. It was partially the suddenness of the entire thing. And of course the full impact that made me bend over in shame and stupidity, even.

It caught me off guard. The sheer force of it. It blinded me. Made me deaf and ignorant. Oblivious to all the subtle pleadings.

Maybe you think I'm dramatising the issue. I'm not.

I hope you understand. Maybe I'm a great actress, out of the blue. But it's not all that easy to un-exist someone. There ain't no erasers to do the trick.

A simpleton could see, this isn't the way it should be. Time. It just needs time.

10:27 PM


RHD, Blacklights, today, and - (shocker)

So. Yesterday. (Ew. Hilary "i'm a good girl" Duff.)

It was RHD yesterday! It was fun. As usual. More so, actually. Since it's our last year. It was a blast. Took a gazillion pictures! It was snap-a-frenzy.

//sidetrack// "Frenzy" looks like "freezing", I don't know why. Which is what I currently am. Freezing. Zipped up my Cedar jacket right to the neck. Ooh. Me in Alsaka, yo! //end//

Basically took tons of pictures. But you know what. I didnt get to take any with Siti, Nuzie and Murny! And a lot of people actually. Like Clara (Lee), Szeling, Dina, squadmates generally, as well as Faizah! And hm. Mrs Chew! And a couple others.

I don't know why she was being such a cow! Really bitchy, it's quite shocking! But I'm sure there's an explanation behind it. Though it's probably no excuse.

Mr Suresh may just leave Cedar! He told us first period (technically second, but who gives). He was being really personal/informal (or as informal as he can get which really isn't. LOL.) with the whole class. He's really sweet. (: Gna miss him fo' sho'.

He ended up giving in to us after all our whinings. So no Emaths for the day! Joy! We ended up going down to the garden/courtyard to take class pics!

What made the day even more beautiful, was the lovely two Bio Prac periods. Which meant free periods for us four (Cynnn, Lilin, Fairuz and I) since we dropped that disgusting subject this year.

We spent a some time talking and rotting in class. It took a while for us to realise that we could head on over to the library! Mdm Heng was nice to us. Let us use the computer. We were the only ones in the library plus her, which made it even cooler. (I don't particularly know why. More privacy?)

We visited various sites. And this one which disgusted/scared the shit out of us. *shivers* Bleargh, yuck. Why'd anyone want to ever do that! It's really... my god. I mean, yes, it's a form of art. But come on! Let's not get overboard, here yeah?

Two hours of pure slack. (Note to self: Huda, prelims are in a month. Get a grip.)

After school, the whole bunch of us cabbed to PS to have lunch at Pizza Hut! Four of us were still in our sarees and Dirah was still in her red sexy cheongsam! Heh. Hey, we're cool kay.

Changed out of our costumes later, into school attire. Which uh. Kinda meant shorts, hse tee and slippers. Hah. Met Murny in the toilet! LOL.

After lunch, we splitted up. Naz, Dirah and I went window shopping! In this case, it was tons of fun cos we were kinda high.

We grabbed hats of different sorts and squeezed into the cubicle and started posing for the camera! Hahah.

Had to leave, to meet Mel! MRT-ed to Bedok. And guess who I had to meet in the train! Murny and Sadiq! Hahah.

When everyone arrived, (two just-met people) walked to TJC! Since I know I'm way too draggy, shall cut it short. Good music + bad music + met new people = great fun.

Hello new people! That's too boring. Let's try it again. Hello friendly new people! (:

The guys from The Leaven Trait are a pretty friendly bunch. Especially Ben. The "young" one. Fiona's friend and friend's friend are too. Carmen and Lyn, respectively.

Recall that one time J and I met "new people"? That Fiona? Turns out Mel knew her too. How small can Singapore get.

Well, smaller apparently.

We were giving our tickets at the entrance, when suddenly I heard someone call my name. Turned around, scanned the faces, all seemed unfamiliar. Scanned again, and found Syakirah's pretty face!

SYAKIRAH! :D I've not seen her in years. Since I quit religious classes! Man. Apparently, she's in TJ now. IP programme. Smart ass.

3Dash1, TLT, and Arrowhead/Aerohead were good!

It's some competition thing between 5 bands. There were some pretty cringe-worthy ones though.

The whole thing ended about 10.30? A whole group of us walked out to the bus stop together. The Easties crossed the bridge to Bedok Int while the other directions people cabbed.

Sat at Macs for about half an hour/ 45 mins? Had good talk with Edison (was it? omg. I cannot rmb. Huda=bad with names. I'm so sry ex-scouts-boy-still-very-active-in-Damai guy.), Ben, Fiona and Mel.

Being open is a very attractive character trait. (Hah. Check that out. "trait".)

28-ed home with Melissa.

Today. Met Mel at City Hall. trooped over to Esplanade, where we, expectedly, bumped into Fatmah! Hello darling! There wasn't enough space for us two so we had to make do at the Singapore Arts Cafe. Did some work.

There was so vocal lesson group or sth rehearsing for an *cringe* upcoming show? They were, um. Pretty bad. =X Not that I can sing or anything. Suppose it does take some guts to sing in front of an audience with a voice like that/like mine.

Far East. Looked around for while. Melissa wanted to find this particular pattern of jewellery be it necklace, earring, ring. But we couldn't find it. She ended up getting this cute red and white checkered thick hairband, which really suits her.

Met the gang (mainly last night people) at Heeren. TLT played three songs only! Last night they had to cut they're performance short cos people from the neighbouring flats complained. So yup.
Had dinner at Cine's LJ. Went home. Periods in between walking to LJS and splitting up at the Orc MRT, were some good interesting talk/revelations/confessions/girl2girl moments. We came up with our stages to continue from Carmen's list. LOL. It's nice to know that you're not the only one facing through that kinda shit. Heh. Misery loves company.

It's 3.59 now. Why can't I sleep? I was craving for fruit juice just now, which was at about 2.30. My brother finished every drop of it! Wth. So I made my own orange milkshake, which is pretty good, I must say!

Yup. In the wee hours, I was busy cutting up oranges, giving the fruit juicer a work out, followed by the blender to "milkshake-ify" it.

You know orange pulp? It's not funny when you're trying to wash them down the sink. Cos they will suddenly abandon each other, floating individually and giving me a bloody hard time!

Okay. You know what. I'm really a loser man. LOL. I've succumbed. *pause* My dear friends, I just made a MySpace account. *beethoven plays dramatically* I sigh. But it's okay! It's still better than friendster? Haha. What a pathetic attempt to save my own skin.

Well, now then. Let's all not get too excited about this little confession. I'm now tired, so do have a goodnight, will you?

PS: If you've got a MySpace acount, you know what to do, yes? Many thanks. HERE

12:53 AM


21 July 2006

A jumble of sorts

Okay hi! Gna make this a very disorganized entry kay. Don't grumble if somehow, you get lost halfway. Cos really. There's too much to update and woo! Brain not catching up all that well y'all.

(I sound really high I know. Must be the 2 cups of coffee. OR IT COULD BE BECAUSE IT'S RACIAL HARMONY DAY TMR!)

We had some Oral course thing sometime this week. Where Mr Mentos and Mr Botak gave us this lecture/seminar/whatchamacallit. (hey, they call themselves that. The first's a snotty English guy and the second's an Australian. The Eng guy calls himself that, yah.)

I know. Please don't rub it in. Oral course. And I'm in it. Omf, I know okay. Burh. Coming from someone who has no difficulty talking/aceing past orals with flying colours, thankyou. (HAHAH. past orals.)

They were funny and entertaining enough. Although, yknow. It kinda doesnt quite relate to a majority of us. Since we do, most of the time, speak English and stuff. This course should be held in our mother tongues. (Until now, I spell tongue with Ms Tong's t-o-n-g and then a u-e. Random.)

Before the course at the AVT, the whole bunch of us (4c) headed to PP Macs. 4c rocks balls.

I think the past few weeks, we've been witnessing the progression of our teachers' state of mind. Mrs Foo, for instance.

4c: So Mrs Foo! What's your horoscope!
MF: It was my brithday on your eng mid yr paper
Jazzy: Taurus!
MF: Yes. Correct. BOO! *both hands doing the "call me" sign horizontal on her forehead*

And when she did her "BOO!" it was really really out of NOWHERE! Totalleh unexpected. The whole class got a shock. It was a good one. You could hear that brief pause of complete silence, when everyone was taking in what she just did. And then the whole class burst out laughing.

Speaking of Mrs Foo, like what LKC said, she's my new "god-mother". Hahah. I kinda wanted our form teacher. But that's okay.

Ytd! National Track&Field Meet! I didn't go last year. Since this would be our last year as a Cedarian, the first batch of tickets were given to the secfours first. The whole bunch of us (4C) headed over together. It was hilarious, our journey there. We took a bus ride that was a gazillion years long.

Got there, about half an hour late. The atmosphere, is nothing, I repeat, nothing, compared to the previous years at the Kallang Stadium. Hello. Choa Chu Kang's like, in the middle of nowhere. And it's not the full Cedarian population, so the *power* and *presence* wasn't felt. ):

I loved the sec two meet. Where it rained, and yet we stood out there constantly cheering the athletes on. We had lots of fun that year's meet.

The relays were really exciting to watch! Especially when there's some drama involved (guy2 unexpectedly catching up with guy1, etc). I swear, when it was Cedar's 4by4, it really felt like the longest 4 mins plus, ever. Everything started slowing down and your ears were suddenly blocked, you can't hear yourself shouting, you can't hear anything! Somewhere you can see a blur of blue jumping up and down in excitement, everyone's main focus was on the Cedarian running.

It was insane.

Oh yeah! Spotted Shengwei! He ran for VS. Not bad, not bad. And later, on the way out when I bumped into him, that fella claims to have not performed well. HOH WELL.

We got overall third, which was cool. Got what we wanted. So it was really cool. Today's morning assembly was rather emotional and touching for the trackers. I mean, Amelia and Jen almost broke down! I'll bet Mr Tay was damn touched. (Cannot believe she didn't comment on it. God.)

Today. School was normal. Fairuz was really strange today. She was so fuggin' outspoken (if that's even what you can call it. lol.) during SS! Weirdo. Oh! And I wasn't as lost as I usually am during Amaths so woohoo! for me there! :D Still doesn't change the way I feel about Relative Velocity though.

It's a Thursday. Which means it's an F day. Ugh. Gross. But we didnt have Jogging since Mr Suresh decided to take that period to do combined Emaths with 4H. Do you how much I dread Emaths? You can ask Sheena. Each Emaths lesson, without fail, I'd ask her how long more till the period's over. Must. break. bad. habit.. Love school!

This morning was strange too. I swear the clock read 6.25! And I was thinking. "Aw fuck. No.." Because the lastest 8 I can take is 6.25. And I've to walk out to the main road's bus stop which is about a 5 min walk. So that would mean that I'd have to take a cab (halfway or not) to not be late. And that is definitely not something I'd do.

But, it turns out! I boarded the 6.16 bus! Which was pretty cool. (:

Sometime this week also. I think it's a Monday. I woke up late. Being the stingy idiot that I am, I took 8, alighted at Bedok Reservoir, somewhere near Faizah's house, and took a cab there to school.

MOTHER COW. (Lock, your influence leh)

I had to fork out a total of 7.80!!!!!!!!! ):):):): I'm so sad. Bloody cab driver's a fucktard too! I remember clearly, I boarded the cab at 6.53! It's not even 7 yet! And how about I didn't even know about the $2 charge recently implemented!! ARGH.

I've no idea too, why I didn't make a big deal of it to the cabbie there and then. Probably because, I really was kinda late already.

Which reminds me. Monday. I was quite pleased about the Listening Compre O Level. First thing's first. I don't know why. But the past few days I've been a real "baby". In the pampered sense? Like I don't know. Ohshutup. Pms, not me.

Anyway, the minute the thing was over, tapped Naz' chair in front of me, compared answers and they're exactly alike! I kinda thought it was rather tough. Tricky. I only filled up 6 ovals the first time they read the stories! Hey. It was quite muffled okay!

AHAH. The end of the Listening Compre. There was the Madrasah people in our school too, in their home clothes. Nuzie, stupidly generously dared me to go up to them and get their entire set of answers.

Of course I did it lah. And so I earned myself 10bucks. :D

But I had to treat her at LJS (there happy?), and minus what I paid in the morn dadidada, I paid about 1 buck plus for the cab fare.

Okay, yah. Back to TODAY!!

(I told you it's gna be an extremely messy post, with no particular "flow".)

After school had Physics Prac Mock Paper. It was okay lah. Miss Tang was being really interactive and friendly! I recall her being very fierce and officer-ish back in sectwo. Oh and somebody was PMS-ing.

After Physics Prac, the class generally splitted up into two; Camp Little India and Camp Chinatown. The seven of us, Naz, Jazzy, Liane, Sheena, Gwen, Lilin and I were the members of Team Little India.

We walked out, me tossing Rach's huge fluffy lovable tomato up in the air, deciding our mode of transportation. To cab or not to cab?

There was one waiting for us patiently (or so it seemed). And out of the blue, this other cab turns in to our school lane there. Like what Lilin said, it's predestined we take a cab there. What are the odds, man!

Little India. It was really fun. Had a great time. We all felt like tourists really in India! Cos it was REALLY darn hot. And I don't know. Everything around us spoke of that place, so it really was exciting! Our own little road trip!

I thought it was real cute that there were so many girls in school uniform scattered around the area! All in their last minute search for a costume for tomorrow!

Mad our way to Hanifaa (where Mrs Chew told us she'll be at about 5 to buy herself a saree to wear with our class! I told you she's awesome).

Nazeehah had a humongous problem deciding which saree to get. The options were endless! It was like cloth left right up down! All of us were "helping" her get the saree. Which of course, equates to ultimate pandemonium. LOL.

She ended up getting this really pretty peach-y colour, with a black velvet inside thingy. That girl really went mad today buying the entire outfit, basically. PLUS accessories. LOL.

Scouted around for bangles! Oh. I got really pretty ones! We all did! Huiyun! I chose for you a really nice blue set okay! Quick bow down with gratitude!(:

We basically just got a lot of accessories! Sheena's hand sticker thing's gna be real pretty. And Gwen's earrings really do match the cloth perfectly! Liane's tatoo thingy's nice too!

We decided to get Jasmines for the class! (Hah. Susila.) And a lovely garland for Mrs Chew!

There was this particular lane we walked on. And myohmy, was it scary! It was really freaky. This old lady suddenly makes her way towards us and like took our hands and then slapped her cheek or something. Oh god. That place gives me the creeps. *shivers*

After walking around some more, we realised we were all starving. So us famished girls made our way to 7-11 and bought their on-the-go combo meals! Which were pretty good actually. Gwen, Shitna Sheena and I got the Chicken Cheese Sandwich (?) combo which was yums. Well, if you're that hungry, anything's tasty, yeah?

It was seriously on-the-go! We were walking with our stuff towards the MRT, eating. LOL.

We parted ways, and yes! Tomorrow's gna be a helluva fun day! Oh no! Our last RHD in Cedar. ): Man. Tons of pics, baybeh! :D Bhavani rocks for loaning me another one of her sarees again! And it's so prettaye too!

Singapore Idol! I can't believe Gayle's out! I was really expecting Jay. What happened to the IJTP support?! Sheesh. LOL. I mean, inspite of everything, she really did look very pitiful just now. It's like she had this "instinct" that she'll be out even before Gurmit announced.

HADY POWER ALL THE WAY! I like Jonathan Leong too tho! And EW. Paul. *disgusted*

Kay, I'm tired and this has been so fucking long. Sry if I bored you with such lengthy and pointless details. Heh.

So what's it now?

12:16 AM


17 July 2006

Equality/fairness can only stretch so much

Today's been relatively alright.

Discovered this last night. Did you know I was tagged by Mr Miyagi 48 days ago! HAHAHA. So it may be a chance thing. But still. It's cool okay. HERE

Too bad I didn't happen to read it in time to do that meme.

I have been jumping ship, back and forth too often already, it's making me sea sick. Whoa. *stumbles; dizzy*

I need to focus, cos all that talk is making me really sick cos it's just wrong. I'm sorry. Call me narrow (for once, ya), but that's just not the way things shoud go. But it is. ):

Okay, brother grumbling overdose. Till next time.

8:24 PM


16 July 2006

Funnest CIP Everr

Windows Live Messenger! I kinda like it. (: Purple's the default colour. Oh so pretty!

CIP today. Metta Welfare Association.

I'm so smart for making them (being Lilin, Huiyun, Janine and Fairuz cos Sheena pulled out last minute) come half an hour earlier. (So they almost nearly killed me for making them wake up earlier/ their father grumble for rushing him. Wth. Almost nearly!?) Just one of the other things I picked up in NP. LOL. (And if you're gna go "Ohmygosh Huda. You actually need to be taught such simple things!?" I'll kick you.)

Had breakfast at BK first. Janine and Fairuz came in grey skirt, hse tee and birkenstocks! After which, made our way to the "gathering place" only to be told that we've got to come back later cos they were short of tins and stuff.


To make it quick, basically, we were given 3 hours free. During which we basically just flitted from place to place. The Gelato shop, where the guy was cool enough to give us a kinda "tour" to see how ice cream's made, and all that. Those two.. *shakes head* Yaya only ah.

Also, to Coffee Bean where the five of us shared a bottle of Diet Snapple. (No, before today I never knew such a drink existed.) Dropped by Topshop where all of us, except Lilin, tried on clothes. I may just get that bustier. At least it's filled, yknow. LOL. I'll wear it with a jacket lah you.

We splitted up. Janine and Fairuz, the three of us. Huiyun and I got an Outfitter Girls tee each! Heh. So us 3 made our way to the City Hall area (bus-ed lah, you nuts!), where we walked to Plaza Sing and further up till Heeren!

Of course we made pit stops here and there. Like at FOS.

After a while, I think that'd be about 45 minutes to an hour later, Huiyun and I got tired. So we settled down at NYDC while Hardworking Lilin continued on! Manhatten Mocha, makes you sick of it after just a short while.

Realised something. Caucasions are not very generous people yknow. Well, at least those I asked! Do I look that not tourist-friendly! How saddening! ):

7-ed back to Bugis, returned the stuff, and went shopping. LOL. Browsed around cos Huiyun wanted to buy something. Ended up in Fox where she got a pair of cute black shorts, Lilin got flip flops and I got another top!

Yay. :D

Oh, I was spotted! But I did not spot! Hahah.

Rushed to Kem MRT to meet Zai and we ended up being about 15 minutes late for tuition. Whoops.

MOLEH MOLEH MOLEH MOLEH. Stupid Chemistry. It pisses me off so bad sometimes. I mean, I could do the questions just now, but it's like Chem. Just the subject.

Speaking of subjects, Sophia just broke to me the news! She's gna drop Lit. Omgomgomg. Slap her, she's French! (random) But really. *Slap* Your choice lah woman. Heh.

Not just you. Am tired too. Sigh.


Today, conversed about something personal with both my parents, including my Dad! (I know "parents" means both of them, it's just really surprising that MY dad's involved!) He was so cool about it. Brutally honest, and away with the beatings around the stupid bush! Suddenly, I feel a stronger bond with Dearest Pa. I cannot deny. I have way too cool parents. :D

"I need some distraction. Oh beautiful release."

9:19 PM


Sweet sixteenth for yet another girl; a few thoughts

Today was a helluva fun time! Happy sweet sixteenth, my dear Siti Zuhairah! Hope you love (note: I didin't say like !) the gifts we got ya! May my birthday be awesome too. Or awesome-er. Heh. I've yet to know what it feels like to be finally sixteen. Boo. ):

More detailed updates another time, with the thousand and one photos we took! (We were camwhoring away at Swensens and at Esplanade!) Well, I hope you had a great sixteenth, yeah! I REALLY wanted to buy that lovely shrug for MYSELF. It was really too pretty, please.

A really summarised one. A "surprise" we thought you knew, but it actually was a surprise. Ooooh.. The birthday dare! (Hot muchachos babe!) Dropped by Baybeats for a while, where we mainly took pics, with the guys taking turns to be photographers!

I love you guys! We always have too much fun, it's wayyy ser-care-ree sometimes! I'm obviously, pretty high right now. Maybe it's because I just created a Bingbox account! LOL. I know. I'm not the kinda person to do this kinda thing! But hey. Why not, yah?

Oh no. Now I'm just like all you lousy suckers with myspace/friendster. HAHAH. Now that I've mentioned it, I have a strong feeling I'll submit to all those calls to just create one already! Hahah. Loo-zah me. Sadsad. ):

Okay, I shall stop this crazy sudden spark of hyperactivity, *coughs, puts on a stern professor's voice* "and get down to some serious business".

I ripped this off DeviantArt which has some really good writings, check it out.This one's by Girldisrupted.

Open letter to broken hearts

We write pages of what it means to love and hurt and let go.

There are bruises that fade, scars that don't, and broken bones that never heal back into the way they were. There are train platforms. Airport departure halls. Unfinished mugs of coffee, stained with lip gloss. Unmade beds.

[And the words

I love you
trapped on the lips of men and women who have no one to speak to.]

In this italicized version of love-not-given, we whisper into parentheses of hope that aren't hopeful at all cause we're always walking away or standing still while someone else turns their back on us.

And yet we still keep coming back for more.
Why do we insist on falling in love over and over when we inevitably fall out? We crash to the ground with sickening thuds and arms that snap like twigs because they no longer have anyone to hold.

And we don’t learn from our mistakes.

Apparently I am the Mistress of Not Learning From My Mistakes, with my dedicated naivety [foolishness] to the art of tripping over and over again. Over my own feet. Or his careless leg, stretched out, unaware of the people around him. And it's not a specific "He" that comes to mind in this moment that does not want to end – but rather the collective mass of faces that I have christened Rejection. [Failure]

So why do we do it?

Why do we have to spend the rest of our lives with one person? And why are we made to feel like shit [less than shit] if we're alone?

I'm 25. Single. And apparently according to the society I live in – on the threshold of spinsterhood. [And there is no knight in shining armour to sweep you over this threshold. Instead you step over with your own two feet into your condemnation.]

Fuck that.

That isn’t what concerns me.

What concerns me is that I am alone and
t i r e d
a l o n e.

But I'm also tired of caring. I'm tired of beginnings despite their excitement and the flutters in my stomach when I wonder if he cares, if he thinks about me, if I'm reading into things more than I should. I am tired of waiting for something to happen despite the pure joy of finding out that you were right and that he did want you and then he kisses you and it's like you feel alive for the first time. Ever. He teaches you how to breathe and you never want things to change.

But they change.

Or things could go in the opposite direction at breakneck speed. Because what if it isn’t pure joy that waits at the end of this road[in a ditch by the side of a back street]. What if it's another rejection. [Remember I am one who doesn’t learn from her mistakes. Or so I've been told]. What if he would only say You shouldn't have said that or You shouldn't have thought that. Or worse. What if there is only silence?

And now? There are thoughts of possibilities that are so far away. Plane rides. First times for more things than I care to think of right now. And what ifs. And pain right below my chest.

Why do they say the heart is the seat of emotions? Aristotle thought it was the liver. But to me – it is that place between the lungs, below the heart, embedded in the blood that flows but not trapped within the confines of a beating heart. No. It's in the cavity. And rightly so. Because emptiness only seems fitting to be the home for these barren feelings.

And I think – take the plunge. Say what has to be said if it means that there's that slightest possibility that you'll hear the words that are waiting to be heard. Somewhere on someone's lips. [And you just have to hope that they are his lips that you will be looking at as he speaks the I love you and he knows that you're waiting for him to kiss you, and he teases you, hesitates just a second longer than you expect… before…]

Being alone is a tiresome feeling.

And it is tiring to think of the people that you want to be with but you can never be sure of their feelings. Not unless you risk everything.

I don’t want my limbs snapped in half.

But what good are they now if they have no one to hold anyway?

We are the backbone of the broken hearted we always come back for more. If we came together, collided cosmically, do you think you would break my heart or I, yours?

I don’t want to be left thinking I should have said something. I could have done something.

I am tired.

Just some food for thought. Ponder about things, and have a goodnight. Or a merry morning cos this page's (Blogger: Red Hot Passion :: Create Post) been empty since god knows when and now it's 2.46 in the AM.

AND I've to be at Bugis by eight for CIP! Man. Why, hello there puffy-er bags and oooh so dark circles. :/

over and over again

2:26 AM


13 July 2006

When the mind's all tied up

Rachel tagged me to do this.

RULES:Bold the statements that are true to you.
Italise the statements that you WISH are true.
Leave the Fibs alone.
Then, stab 5 people to do the same test.

I miss somebody right now.
I dont watch TV these days.
I wear glasses or contact lenses.
I love to play video games.
I've tried marijuana.
I have been in a threesome.
I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
I curse sometimes.
I have changed a lot mentally over the last year. (aye. can't be too sure.)
I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
I'm TOTALLY smart.
I've broken someone's bones.
I'm paranoid sometimes.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
I need money right now.
I love sushi.
I talk really,really fast. (sometimes)
I have long hair.
I have lost money in Las Vegas.
I have at least one sibling.
I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
I couldn't survive without Caller I.D.
I like the way i look.
I am usually pessimistic.
I have a lot of mood swings.
I have a hidden talent.
I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
I have a lot of friends. (generally. I mean you know. Ya. Generally.)
I am currently single.
I have pecked someone of the same sex.
I enjoy talking on the phone.

I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
I love to shop.
Enjoy window shopping.
I would rather shop then eat.

I don't hate anyone. (dislike, maybe. hate, I don't think so.)
I'm a pretty good dancer. (okay lah. not fantastic or whatever *looks at Dirah*)
I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
I have a cellphone. (hoh my gawd. may the stars be with me this week. *prays)
I believe in God.
I watch MTV on a daily basis. (well, it's the first channel I flip to. even before the tv's switched on properly. lol.)
I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
I've rejected someone before.
I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life. (I'm just scared I won't get it.)
I want to have children in the future.
I have changed a diaper before.
I've called the cops on a friend before.
I'm not allergic to anything. (bloody seafood.)
I have a lot to learn.
I have been with someone at least 10 years older or younger.
I am shy around the opposite sex. (sometimes I think it wouldnt kill to be a little less open. LOL.)
I have tried alcohol before.
I have made a move on a friend's significant other or crush in the past. (interesting)
I own the "South Park" movie.
I would die for my best friends.
I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.
I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all. (rachel got it right. i LOVE it! not really MJ, but the scandals.)
Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
I watch Spongebob Squarepants and I like it.
I am happy at this moment! (It's a half half thing)
I'm obsessed with guys.
I study for tests most of the time.
I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I've ever met.
I am comfortable with who I am right now.
I have more than just my ears pierced.
I walk barefoot wherever i can.
I have jumped off a bridge.
I love sea turtles.
I spend ridiculous money on makeup.
Plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
I'm proficient in a musical instrument. (I've always wanted to master something. WHYWHYWHY did I quit violin in P3!)
I worked at McDonald's restaurant.
I hate office jobs.
I love sci-fi movies. (my god. i HATE it!)
I think water rules.
I went college out of state.
I like sausages.
I love kisses.
I fall for the worst people.
I adore bright colours.
I can't live without black eyeliner.
I don't know why the hell I just did this stupid thing.
I usually like covers better than originals.
I can pick up things with my toes.
I can't whistle.
I can move my tongue in waves, much like a snakes slither.
I have ridden/owned a horse.
I still have every journal I've ever written in.

(I used to leave my written book diaries at random places like buses/libraries/wedged bewteen something, whenever I realise the need to start afresh. Bcos somehow I just wanted someone, anyone to pick it up and read about my life. Let them know me as intimately as possible. Right down to the last detail. I know it's weird. But well. It's the same with blogs. We want people to read what we write, how we feel, etc.)

I can't stick to a diet.
I talk in my sleep.

I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions. (huh. on the contrary, I think I think about it too much till it "seeps into my subconscious". UGH.)
Climbing trees is a brilliant past-time.
I have jazz in my blood.
I wear a toe ring.
I have a tattoo.
I can't stand at LEAST one person that I work with. (in this case that'd be classmates, I take it?)
I am a caffeine junkie.
I cosplay or know what cosplaying is.
I have been to over 15 conventions.
I will collect anything, and the more nonsesical the better.
I'm an artist. (I've always envied those who could do wonders with brushes/pencil/wtvr tool they use)
I only clean my room when necessary.
I like a person of the same sex.

Hm. 5 people huh. Well, I'm gna be open about this. Who wants to do this just rip this off man!

And this is Clara's set of answers for me. It's this weird thing. Something like if you were to tag me about this entry, I owe you this. But you'd have to put it up on your blog. Or sth.

1. I’ll respond with something random about you

you like red and purple, jsng and ronniegoh, and your worst part of lit is the unseen component.

2. I’ll challenge you to try something

RJ 2007-2008. remember the deal(:

3. I’ll pick a colour that I associate with you

a fiery bright shade of red, something in line with your personality. passion, fury, all that sort of thing.

4. I’ll tell you something I like about you

when you're not busy being grumpy/a cow, you're fun and nice to talk to. and you speak your mind, which i really like, cos i think not enough people do.

5. I’ll tell you my first/clearest memory of you

i think it is all the OAC stuff, when we were all at loggerheads. i don't know why i have no clear memory of you before that. you used to call sheena 'sheeney', and you got frustrated with us cos we talked incessantly during the nights at OAC. hahah sorry gruds.

6. I’ll tell you what animal you remind me of

ehhhhh, i don't know. maybe a kangaroo. (sheesh. what is it with kangaroos! LOL)

7. I’ll ask you something I’ve always wanted to ask you

i know you're not going to answer this, but exactly what are your issues ?


Today. Bumped into Fairuz, on the bus to school, in like a gazillion years, and we just had to talk about the most depressing thing ever. Prelims. :/ Early in the fuggin' morning, please. We were also busy critiqueing (sp?) the models on TV Mobile. LOL.

Faye, our body balance instructor wasn't here today. So this Amy, took her place. And I think she's better! Cos she's much more clearer when she's giving out instructions. My thighs are gna hurt like a mofo tmr. YAY.

Jogging was shite. Cos it's been ages. And honey, 2 rounds around the whole school, under the scorching sun is really "ARGH!"-inducing. According to Duck Chan, I've too much melanin, which is why I turn dark really easily.

It was less than 30minutes under the sun! Because of all this sweaty activities, my face is now cluttered. There's like 10 pimples. One HUMONGOUS one beside my left eye. Sigh. Retribution for making fun of Diana's.

MT was hilarious. We had the usual good dose of crap talk with Cikgu. While doing so, we were scanning today's papers; we were in the library. AND OMG. Did you see Cristiano! He looked SO PANAS. Life section. He looked so good. I could just eat him up. AHHHHHH.

Cikgu was telling us that if old makciks can kiss Dia's father (i cant spell his name) as well as Taufik, she has no idea what is to become of us younger generations! Hahah.

Also, I really don't think I sound funny when I speak Malay. Apart from the fact that I stall a lot to think of the words in Malay, I really do think I sound fine! Wah. Cikgu ah.

Chemistry after school was pure TORTURE. Ohmygosh it was terrible. It's the day. I'm pretty sure Thursdays are cursed.

After Chem met up with the Prats minus Mud (only met him for like 10 minutes when he dropped by before heading for tuition). It was talk over pratas and Cleo's Little Book of Naughty Moves. LOL. August issue's out, y'all.

Najib, just go and do it please. It was rather interesting, the conversation we had. Hm.

Ending this off with another questionnare!

1. TV show: Life As We Know It, 8th & Ocean, Supernatural, My Super Sweet Sixteenth, The Simpsons, a lot more.
2. Flower: Rose, sunflower! Well, to be given a flower is sweet enough in the first place.
3. Alcohol: -
4. Movie: Too many. And of various genres. Titanic! The Parent Trap! Practical Magic!
5. Color: Red & purple
6. Sport: Hm. Dancing, count?
7. Mall: Wisma, I suppose. Or Far East. Or wait. TM! HAHAHA.
8. Music: Anything mellow, and classics are great too.
9. Food: As long as it's not raw. I have a disgustingly sweet tooth too. Hello, diabetes.
10. Season: Singapore's winter where it's all dark, rainy and gloomy.

(I don't follow the singular terms. Heh.)

1. Hometown: Tampines
2. Height: Nearing 1.6 lah shut up.
3. Hair color: Natural colour. Black.
4. Hair Length: Long. When it's wet and straight it's halfway down my back!
5. Hair style: What style. Curly and frizzy and fucking annoying. :/
6. Eye color: Black.
7. Shoe size: 7/8
8. Mood: Confused
9. Sexuality: Straight
10. Status: Single.


1. Have you ever been in love: I don't think so.
2. Do you believe in love: Yes.
4. Have you ever been heartbroken: Yes.
5. Have you ever broken someone's heart: Um. Yeah.
6. Have you ever fallen for your best friend: Hahah. Got lah. But a passing thing. Besides, then we aren't as close now. So not counted. LOL.
7. Are you planning on getting married: Yes.
8. Are you afraid of committment: Kinda? I mean. Gee. The thought of having to answer to someone else other than your parents is kinda freaky.
9. Would you ever get married to someone of the same sex: I'm not against it or anything. But I sure hope not!
10. Would you ever have sex with someone of the same sex: Nope.

1. Love or lust: 50-50
2. Hard liquor or beer: -
3. Night or day: Split even.
4. Hook-ups or relationship: Depends, really.
5. TV or internet: TV! You'll just have to sit back and enjoy the show!
6. Pepsi or coke: I rarely drink either, but I'd say Coke.
7. Wild night out or romantic night: Depends. If it's with a bunch of girls, the first one. If and when attached, the latter. Actually, a wild night out (tons of fun and crazy with spontaniety) with the guy can be fun too.
8. Saturday or Sunday: Saturday
9. Colored or black and white picture: Monochrome's cooler.
10. Phone or in person: In person.

(this is evidence that I'm indecisive. ): boo.)

1. Have you ever been caught sneaking out: Nope. #1, I don't have to. #2, even when I do, I'm too good to get caught please. (:
2. Have you ever skinny dipped: No.
3. Have you ever done something you regret: Yeah. But acceptance and getting over it is the key.
4. Have you ever bungee jumped: Oh gosh no. I'm terrified. So not looking forward to October. ):
5 Have you ever been on a house boat: No.
6. Have you ever finished an entire jaw breaker: And that is....?
7. Have you ever wanted someone so badly it hurt: Hell yes.
8. Have you ever stayed up all nite until the sun came out?: Yup.
9. Have you ever been caught by your parents with a hickey: =X
10. Have you ever been caught by your parents doing anything more than making out: No lah. Aiyoh.


1. Are you missing someone right now: Uh huh. Aniszah! Where are you!!! And dear Aries.
2. Are you in love with anyone: Doubt it. Nah, dunch think so.
3. Are you happy: More or less. I mean, I have a family, I'm not starving, begging in the streets. But 50-50 really if we're talking more than the "neccesity" list.
4. Are you talking to anyone right now: Nah. Me time's always welcomed.
5. Are you bored: No. I have too much on my mind. It's throbbing in protest.
6. Are you German: No.
7. Are you Irish: No.
8. Are you Italian: If only.
9. Are your parents still married: Happily married.
10. Do you like someone right now: Hm.

1. Male friend(s): Mud & Najib
2. Female friend(s): Aniszah's the only safest bet to put up here. (We dont go ard claiming we're "BESTIES" tho. As in. The kinda unspoken thing yknow?)

1. Person you saw: Hakiem, my brother.
2. Talked to on the phone: My mum.
3. Hugged: This is so sad. I can't rmb! But I rmb hugging someone today tho!
4. Messaged over Friendster: Hi there. I'm cooler than you. I don't have one. :D

1. Wearing&brand: The black tee Delph bought to support M. Xiaofern the other time. And sch shorts.
2. Better than yesterday?: No. Worse, actually. Thursdays = F days. On top of that, that.

1. Is: Friday. A good day. Hiya weekend! You shd drop by more often ya know.
2. Got any plans: Yeah, I do actually. Jealous? LOL.

1. Number: Hmm. 3?
2. Color: Purple&red. Eh, you asked before right!
3. Season: Sg's winter

1. Missing someone: Yeah. Someone(s).
2. Mood: Still as confused.
3. Wanting: to consume something to make my head lighter and forget! Yes. Complications suck.
And you too.

10:33 PM


A knot-ty mess

I'm so tired but I can't sleep
Standin' on the edge of something much too deep
It's funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word
We are screaming inside
But we can't be heard

12:14 AM


10 July 2006

Youth Day & Sunday

Hello world! This is gna be a really long one. I love to blogbinge, remember? Shall we go according to dates? Or "lightest" topic to the not so light ones? Hmm.

Choosing the latter. Here goes.

Youth Day! Girls (day) out with Naz, Dirah and J! Life w/o a phone is COMPLETE misery. Public phones are such a rare sight. It's times like this do you realise the importance of gut instincts. Quite sad, isn't it?

Met the gorgeous ones at Dhoby Gaut, and made our way to Clarke Quay! It was so fuckin' hot. I swear, I thought I was gna melt anytime soon. Seriously. The heat was incredible. There was sweat in between my shades thingy. Wah cow. HOT.

And to think that I used to train under such conditions a million times over (read: NP). Lol.

Dropped by the AIR CONDITIONED toilet.

And spent years hibernating inside. Vain girls, yah okay, got it.

Studied at Dirah's mom's shop, which was actually pretty conducive! It is after all a "night life" area, so during the days, it's pretty calm. While walking there, we took an especially long detour about the place. Hooters! Eh Mud, the girls there aren't that hot y'know. Let down sia.

Saw her Dad too. It's true. He does remind me of Mr Ronnie Goh! The mannerisms, etc. LOL.

Had FREE lunch. (Cheapos.)

Settled down and my god. That freaking box hates me. I've no idea what I've done to it. See, I was standing on the chair, to adjust the fan mounted on the wall. While standing up, my back hit the the sharp end of the box. It hurt like fuck. It bled okay. The scar's still there.

Made fantastic love with Longman's Chemistry for a couple of hours. AHHH.. Sweet love..

Went over to 7-11 and bought chocolates! Chocs=endorphins=happy us=happy us studying! See? Works well, so whyth not! Again, the Cheapos bought the Van Houtten bar which was on offer at a buck. Cravings. Ugh. Post menstrual isn't any better. (I'm pretty sure I'm just using that as an excuse.)

About six? Walked around some more. The view's pretty amazing. It's beautiful, really. The whole atmosphere. By the river.. People talking, chilling out with everything at ease. The sky, hinting it's true beauty. Boats passing by, bobbing up and down in a hypnotising rhythm. Little kids running around, squealing which was, at that point, music to the ears. Everyone was smiling, it really was an amazing feeling. "At peace".

It's baffling to note how things appear so very different, according to your moods. The power of the mind. The way you look at things..

Lit unseen today! Mrs Peh was quite funny. She was talking about how the great poets either end up mental or commit suicide. Lol. According to her, they're too idealistic. So they see the world as a very bitter place. And end up being very unhappy. But at the same time, being so brilliant writing their "dark" pieces.

The power of thinking without thinking! Okay, sorry. Random. Reading Malcolm Maxwell, currently. Naz' dad's. Heh. Blink! I think I'll end up buying the book.

We had lots of fun. Sight seeing and stuff. Cos it's a "new" place. Not one we're familiar with. Which makes the "wow-factor" go ten times higher. (:

(I've got pics to put up. But evidently, after enough trys, the computer is in no mood to be kind and co-operate with me. Instead, it chooses to be a huge pain. So yeah. Pics another time time yeah! And you know what's worse, is that I've edited some of these pics on Paint, fro the first time evaaa yo! And I can't put it up. SIGH.)

The entire week, school was okay. Mundane, even sometimes? Alright, overall. Stocking up on mints. To keep me from falling asleep. It helps, really. Sorry Novabelle.

Sunday. Tuition after a month. Heh. Mr Alwi and his antics. At least now I won't have to go to and go back from tuition alone. So that's cool. Did MOLES. Dirah and I were just talking about how dumb Chemistry is. Compared to Physics, or even as a subject on its own. Chemistry. The bane of my life. *rolls eyes*

So after about two and a half hours, Zai and I trooped over to Mud's. Walked in the rain. ): Welcome frizz shizz. Found the three of them watching tv. Boringzz manxzx. (Noooooo. LOL) Relak jack-ed around. (Mud's term.) Mariam left, to have steamboat dinner with her fam, cos we kinda decided against going to Mud's condo? Yup.

Mud and Najib walked her halfway. Came back. And Najib was rather disappointed that we didn't end up going to Clearwater, so the four of us ended up cabbing there!

It was nice man. Najib's third time, the first for us two. Wah. Effing nice. Felt so "jakun". His parents were there! Imagine, my horror when I saw the two pairs of shoes by the door! (I'm kinda scared of his dad. Sho sherious! MP, duh. Felt a bit. I dont know. Like scrutinized, kinda? Hahah.) His mum was warm and inviting, as usual.

The view from the hall was amazing. (Penthouse, yo!) But the view from Mud's room was better! Especially when it's dark, and you can see the street lamps reflected on the reservoir.. It really was very pretty. <3>

Hid inside the room upstairs to watch more tv. Hah. Us boring people. I slept through most parts of Pirates of the Carribean. LOL. Ordered KFC, to not get the food two and a half hours later, cos the delivery guy got into an accident! Omg. How suay is that. ): Poor guy.

Mud rang up KFC, dadidada. The food was in a terrible state (meaning the box tore), when this Indian bloke brought it up and told us the news. So in the end, we only got our food come 9.30 plus minus.

We were starving. Ended up eating random weird stuff we could find in the fridge. Like a 2 year expired bar of Cadbury! Yeah, we ate it and I'm still standing, so all's cool. Hunger got the better of us lah.

The boys were waiting and waiting and waiting for the bloody food to arrive. To such an extent, that Mud stood outside, by the lift shouting in whenever the lift would pass the 11th floor for example, with such excitement cos it could be our food! We were on the 16th. LOL.

Ate, chilled a bit, and by about 10.30 we were out! Mud was being such a paraniod, ensuring all the lights/fans were switched off..etc..

Got back, took a quick shower and hit the sack man!

//the whole chunk was written on Monday night, if I'm not wrong. I saved it under "draft" cos Blogger refuses to let me upload pics. And oh hell. It's fuggin' annoying. //

8:12 PM


04 July 2006

World on Fire; Another reason why I love her

Hearts are worn in these dark ages
You're not alone in this story's pages
Night has fallen amongst the living and the dying
And I try to hold it in, yeah I try to hold it in

The world's on fire and
It's more than I can handle
I dive into the water
(I try to pull my ship)
I try to bring more
More than I can handle
(Bring it to the table)
Bring what I am able

I watch the heavens and I find a calling
Something I can do to change this moment
Stay close to me while the sky is falling
Don't wanna be left alone, don't wanna be alone


Hearts break, hearts mend
Love still hurts
Visions clash, planes crash
Still there's talk of
Saving souls, still the cold
Is closing in on us

We part the veil on Archille's sun
Stray from the straight line on this short run
The more we take, the less we become
A fortune of one that means less for some

[Chorus X2]

11:09 PM


It's sort of like watching a perfect sunset with nobody special. There's still a great view you can appreciate.

Hey! So, ytd, was great fun with the girls! Will update abt that another time with pictures, okay? Cos I'm trying to make this quick, cos I'm only supposed to read up Twelfth Night related stuff. But noooo.. Instead, I find myself logging in to Blogger. Grr. I'm sucha looozerh. :/

I tried watching football on Friday night, if I'm not wrong, to see what the hype's about. After about 25 minutes, I couldn't take it! It's just a buncha guys going after a ball, getting all dramatic, faking fouls or whatever. I mean, it's like green ALL over! I know it's good for the eyes. So next time I feel like I'm gna lose my *pre boast alert* perfect 06/06p eyesight, I shall catch a match!

But I caught the highlights the next morning though. I was just there reading, and my dad happened to be watching it, and I was like oh wth. Let's give it another shot. HAHAHA. I thought it was pretty amusing the whole Rooney/Ronaldo thing. Okay, I, here, (note: it's just MY point of view, don't kill me. *looks at half of 4c), think that yeah, Cristiano was a bit neh. But you know what. He's so hot, he's forgiven! Haha. Aiyah, Rooney looked like such a sore sport, anw. From the same team some more. Sheesh. See. This is a perfect example that boys, can be just as bitchy.

And you know what. Football players are such drama kings. I swear, Beckham beat Victoria at that! I mean, all she did was cover her face, then god knows what. Acting like she actually cares. Lol.

I can't believe stupid classmates of mine, England supporters duh, drew on Cristiano's face! I mean. He's good eyecandy! You cannot do that! Now I can't look past Mr Suresh during Emaths to look at him. Sigh.

Mr Sng asked our class, during lit just now, who do we think is the hottest footballer. Who won? Kaka? Beckham? Hm. Okay, that reminds me of all the Lit stuff, due tmr! Ohmygosh. And I can't go to the Lit Symposium at SCGS this Sat! ): It didn't even cross my mind that it was POP that day. Too soon? Sigh. Gone are my eight bucks!

Been listening to lots of Mellow music. (Yes, capital 'M'.) It soothes the soul! I'm quite a fan of Sarah Mclachlan, now. She's awesome. Her songs are great, her lyrics, uber cool. I'll go dig around Cash Converters for her old CDs some day.

Her videos are amazing too. I love the way she gives it a real good artistic/abstract twist, matching the lyrics, as subtle as it may be, but still matching. If I were to turn lesbian, I swear, my other half better have songwriting skills like her. And sing like her. And have her "art" touch. But doesn't have to look like her. Ahh. Might as well be her. Lol.

But chances are like zilch. Both that I'll turn crooked and her being my other half even if I'm not straight. Ohwell.

Today. Parade. It was bittersweet. Hierarchy announced. I still can't believe it's gna be this Saturday. I have so much threatening to spillover. Held it in check. Good things come to those who wait. (: I shall keep that in mind, cos it certainly ties in with other things going on right now.

Enough mysteries, I know you hate it. Two words for ya then! Too bad! Haha. Sorry. I just felt like being an irritant. See yah (not too) soon, I hope!

Here's to Aries. (: It'll be fine. Trust me.

10:17 PM


01 July 2006


You've been gone so long all that you know
has been shuffled aside as you bask in the glow
of the beautiful strangers who whisper your name
do they fill up the emptiness?

Larger than life is your fiction
In a universe made up of one
You have been drifting for so long
I know you don't want to come down
Somewhere below you, there's people who love you
And they're ready for you to come home
Please come home

You walk in a room and the world stops to stare
Mesmerize all who are caught in the glare
Of the spotlight that follows wherever you go
Does it light up the emptiness?

Larger than life is your fiction
In a universe made up of one
You have been drifting for so long
I know you don't want to come down
Somewhere below you, there's people who love you
And they're ready for you to come home
Please come home

Clear your fucking head and stop it with all the orange lights. It's either green or red. Choose.

10:44 AM


It's been an Okay week.

Had our first Body Balance class on Thursday! Our school has decided to call in an instructor so this shall be our PE for the next 2 months! Body Balance is a combination of Tai Chi, yoga and pilates. It was pretty exciting. Beats the "drills" Ms Leong used to make us do anyway. AND softball, or whatever it is we used to do. So yay there. Muscle aches the next day's no joke though.

Gna go to the SYF Opening Ceremony later to see Aries.(:

Gna be aracde-ing with Hilda and Geraldine first though. I don't arcade! Not really.. Ohwell. Doing something you don't normally do, can't be too bad, can it?

Mrs Chew is really very nice to us. Sometimes, I kinda feel like we don't deserve her? About that, I'll bet it's *the* story circling around in the staff room. Hm.

Homework load this weekend, is amazing. So, yes, it's partially because of the pile up since the hols, but still! Amaths, lit..

Trying, but it's tough? Ah fuck. What should I do then!? Drama=not necessary. It's like. Nothing's happening. Doesn't seem to give two hoots. Or even one for that matter. No attempts made!!! Argh. Frustrating. :/

I want to, but I can't! Omg, I JUST can't! It's really irritating. Pride, perhaps? Sigh. You, not you.

You, I'm not gna care, for the moment.

10:30 AM


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If there's one word to describe this girl, it'd be loud. She's easy going and incredibly fun. She'd like to think of herself as approachable (though some claim she looks arrogant and/or fierce). She's highly opinionated and outspoken. Friends insist she's fickle and whines an awful lot. At times, acid-tongued, especially when provoked. A hopeless romantic, that she is. A dreamer. Her mood and emotions fluctuate about in this outrageous manner. Pretty bubbly, loves a good conversation anytime, anywhere. She appreciates beauty of all forms. Quite the idealist, an avid mind wanderer, she'd say. She also finds the horoscope incredibly fascinating. Trust me, you'll love her, if you don't already do. (:

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