Red Hot Passion
23 August 2005

hey there! sry for not updating the past few days. in a state of got-better-things-to-do, y'know?

anyways, my blog is still under repair. but you know what, i dont think it's that bad. i mean, still got the picture and can still read my entry right?

got back a few papers today. damn. eng tcher paper JUST PASSED. great. i cant even excel in the subject i take as my best/forte. how nice.

it's okay. i shall work harder. yes. and no, it wont be a NATO thing. NO okay! it wont.

oh and yes, i'd like to apologise for the recent "distance" and vagueness in the past few entries. it's not that i dont wanna mention everything in details... but... well. one word. restrictions. oh, and another follow up-consequences.

today was a rather short day. that is till the last period where loy dragged the lesson on even after the bell rang. URGH. so inconsiderate okay! i mean hello! she always drags her lesson to the next lesson. thus, causing a freaking chain effect which obviously never occured to her. think deeper into the situation huh? well well well... who's eating her words now?

and yes! ugh. miss begam! y'know at least i took into consideration to inform you that i wont be attending for chem extra lesson for personal reasons which i find of more importance then, i'm sry to say, chemistry. i mean. forget it. why bother explaining myself when it doesnt matter ANYWAY.

so, all those who didnt go on mon after sch had to see her during reading today. AND we had to fill up this form thingy. like parent's name and contact number, reflection, blahblahblah. you wanna call my mum? CALL MAN! let's just see what my mum would fire back at you okay? i state my priorities. i made it clear that it's not that i hate chem or i dont like you or i just want to skip the lesson right.

so yes. my mum's doesnt just take things as it is on the surface ok. i mean. whatever lah. let's just see what'll happen.

and yes. i know everthing that happens is the result of how much effort i've put in. I KNOW. who the hell doesnt. i reap what i sow. yes. i get it. so back off.

okay, all angst and frustration aside, let's see what else i have to say.

oh yes. after school, went to key in the cca thingy with xw, xq and su. it was pretty erm. confusing/chaotic at first. but it was just the com. -.-"

yup. oh yes. and recess today, tried the 2a spaghetti thingy. it was actually rather good. hilda, sumi and jolene tasted it and they cant believe that cocoa powder was actually part of the ingredient. lol. fusion food.

read ma'ams charmaine's, gauri's and li wen's blog. made me tear like crap. just when i thought i'd be stronger and over the crying stage. ohwells. i guess the r'ship delphinus had with crater was different and somehow closer as compared to previous squads maybe cos of the yr gap?

thank you crater for everything.

oh and i went to read up on delphinus' constellation and everything. it was enlightening, definitely.

talked to tricia on the phone just now. becoming a routine. die lah. take up my time only! no no. just kidding. call anytime yah.

oh yes, yesterday, had a "meeting" with our ncos. touching, inspiring, cute and really sad. emotional. there was an exchange of letters. and i think our gift is so cute! they had to fall out before they were presented to us y'know! :D

oh. and process your thoughts before you let it slip out of your mouth! yes. always keep that in mind! (self note: ALWAYS keep it in mind.)

ok. this is too long. so yep. till the next entry, goodnight.

ps: i know this entry is in fragments and not in any particular order. so yes. sorry. i'm just not in the right state of mind right now. =x

pps: i think everything happens for a reason. you dont have to blame yourself for it. that's no reason why you cant still live life to the fullest and enjoy what you can. no point in dwelling about what problems you face. cheer up and think positive okay? NO MORE suicidal thoughts or thinking of running away alright. everything happens for a reason. something great will always happen to overpower this set back. it's just a matter of time before you finally see the light in the presently dark world to you. smile always and dont let it affect your r'ship with others. rmb, just because it hurts you, it doesnt mean you have to let it hurt others too.

Huda
10:08 PM
 

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